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I am going to try to help answer your question.
I m sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time with your x. I would recommend that you file a petition to modify custody. I would request all adults that have contact with your son submit to a hair follicle test. I would also recommend requesting a guardian ad litem be appointed. A guardian ad litem is an attorney who represents your son not you , not father and not paternal grand parents. Courts give a lot of weight to the guardian because he or she represent the child. It is also the best way to get your child's say in front of the court. The Guardian ad litem can inspect each house, school, doctors, teachers, relatives, etc.
I would also file your petition as soon as possible to modify.
I hope this information is helpful and I wish you the best of luck.