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FamilyAnswer, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 28054
Experience:  10 + years of handling Family Law, Divorce, Child Custody and Child Support cases
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My girlfriend a.d I found out she was pregnant 1 month after

Customer Question

My girlfriend a.d I found out she was pregnant 1 month after dating. The problem is she was 7.5 months pregnant at the time. So the child is not mine. She took a test 2 months prior and it came back negative and also had 2 ultra sounds for gasteroic problems and never any baby mentioned. I asked to to take another test and it came back positive. The doctors gave us a due date of 8/23. The baby was born 8/2, 3 weeks early. She notified her ex about it and he wants nothing to do with the child. My questions are: what are our options? I am sticking around. I've only been dating her for 2.5 months and there is a 12 day old child here that isn't mine (maybe I'm crazy, but I'm here now). Neither of us want the father involved, no child support or anything. He is bad Into drugs now and that's the only reason he text her now to drive him places, but she won't and wants nothing to do with him. Do we ignore him or do we ask him to sign the rights of the baby over? Or what can we do?
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  FamilyAnswer replied 2 years ago.
Hi! I will be the professional that will be helping you today. I look forward to providing you with information to help solve your problem.
Good morning. Did the mother list him on the birth certificate as the father? Do you know if he wants anything to do with the child? I understand where you and your girlfriend stand but curious to know where he is at with this
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
The paternal part of the birth certificate was left blank. (Which we didn't know if that was right to do or not). We told him about the child and the message he responded with was "put it up for adoption." The next day he text her asking for a number to a cook that works at her diner looking for drugs. She did not respond and that is the only contact we have had with him the last month. He know is living rent free and mooching off his new girlfriend, so he does not want her to find out she got his ex (my girlfriend) pregnant.
Expert:  FamilyAnswer replied 2 years ago.

Thank you for the additional information. It is clear that the father wants nothing to do with the child. As such, the decision to adopt the child and have them as your own, is up to you. You could continue to live with her and care for the child and when the time comes that you marry, you could then adopt the child. If the father is willing to terminate his rights and anything related to that, the court should not have a problem with this happening. At this point, he nor the mother has to do anything, since he is not listed on the birth certificate and there is nothing right now for him to sign away but when the time comes that you want to take the next step, you can and adopt the child.

Customer: replied 2 years ago.
if later in life he wises up can he ask for a paternity test and try amd take custody of child? If so how can we protect ourselves to say he wanted nothing to do with the child right now? If I do marry her yes I would like to adopt the child, but is there something we can do now to keep ourselves safe? Like can he sign the rights over to the mother fully so he cannot come back into our lives legally In a few years. I mean if the child wants to meet her birth child and we can agree on visitation, that's fine. I just don't want him making demands in court and getting rights
Expert:  FamilyAnswer replied 2 years ago.

He can relinquish his rights to the child, once it is established that he is the biological father and that would prevent him from coming back later. Then, once married, you could adopt the child.

Expert:  FamilyAnswer replied 2 years ago.
I just wanted to follow up and see if you had any other questions or needed me to clarify something. I am here to help, so please let me know. Thanks!