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Ellen, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
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Experience:  25 years of experience helping people like you.
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My ex has stopped paying my monthly alimony. He was in the

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My ex has stopped paying my monthly alimony. He was in the military prior to our 9yr marriage, and has now, after being out of the service since 1992, has successfully been deemed "disabled" and is receiving disability from the gov. He has informed me he no longer has to pay me. Divorced in 2009(infidelity), I was quit-claimed our cabin and as alimony was to make the $1200 mortgage payment. In 2010 he disappeared for 18 months and didn't pay anything, when he finally resurfaced, after a letter from my attorney, he said he would try to and has been paying $500 a month for the last 2yrs(missing a month here and there). He is over 30,000 in arrears. He has destroyed my credit rating and I have struggled to keep this home, I am a massage therapist/fitness trainer. I have been more than accommodating, hoping to just get the $500 a month, but now he says he does not have to pay. I really can not afford an attorney. The info online is confusing. What are my rights. We are both residents of NC.
*This chat is not intended as legal advice. It is general information that may or may not apply to your situation and should not be relied upon.*


Thank you for your question. My name is XXXXX XXXXX I will do whatever I can to answer your questions!

Regardless of your former husband circumstances, there is a court order in effect requiring that he pay alimony. He is bound by that court order unless or until a court orders otherwise. Therefore you may consider bringing a contempt action to compel your ex to adhere to the order and bring the alimony current.

A contempt of court is the courts method of enforcing its prior order. When a person does not perform chording to a court order, the person is considered to be in contempt of court. To enforce your rights you will need to file a motion for contempt (may also be called an motion to show cause). In that motion you indicate what the orders are and how he has violated them.

You can typically pick the forms up at the clerk of the court's office and file them yourself.

I would be glad to continue our conversation and respond to any follow-up questions that you may have.
Ellen and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I just got off of the phone with my ex, and he has assured me that I can not get any money from his VA disability payments. He suggested I "lawyer up". Is there any state run service that will help me thru this process, or do I have to go to an attorney. Money is obviously an issue for me.

Hello Patricia,

You may try your local legal aid for free or low-cost legal services.

If they are not able to assist you, you may consider filing a motion for contempt yourself. You can typically obtain the forms at the clerk of the court's office

Please let me know if you need any clarification. I would be glad to assist you further if I can
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Thank you for your reply, I will try. I live in Boone, NC...I went to the clerks office and they promptly, and most emphatically assured me that I could not get the forms. I would have to have an attorney "draw them up". I knew she was incorrect, (found them on the "internets") but she made it clear that I was WRONG in thinking I could somehow get these elusive parchments on my own. I'm dealing with some real dipshits over here

Thank you for the laugh this morning. It has been my pleasure to work with you.

I am here to help. To speak with me again, simply place my name in the first sentence of your new question. If I cannot help you, I can direct you to someone who can.

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Thanks again and all the best to you.