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originallawyer, Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 879
Experience:  9+ years of experience in divorce, custody battles and mediation.
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in North Carolina: non-married, no court order as of yet. I

Customer Question

in North Carolina: non-married, no court order as of yet. I had a child in dec 2010. I and his mother agreed to a set schedule, in which i switched to a 7pm to 7am job so that i could be the mon-fri parent, (my job is monitoring high risk kids with a partner, as to rotate naps). For the last 2.7 years I've had him monday, tuesday then dropping him off at 5:30pm and picking him up at 8am thurs. and fri.; mother having him sat. sun. and evenings wed-fri. we took turns on holidays/b-day doctor appointments and filings on taxes. This schedule was concrete with no complaints, let alone dss involvement. The other day as i dropped him off on a wed. i was informed that she signed him up for an undisclosed daycare, filing for full custody due to neglect and was suing me for support (she make a lot more money btw) and her legal fees... a year ago i had informed her that our child escaped after i dozed off while sick, (not documented) and was brought back by a neighbor as he was sitting in the driveway, (5 min time frame). She consoled me at that time, and has made no comments/text/inquisitions as to saftey, my well being or his. i am retaining a lawyer, but would like advice as to my course to continue joint custody. or if i even have a chance. What angle should I proceed with or expect in this upcoming temp custody hearing?
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  originallawyer replied 4 years ago.
Yes, you should definitely continue on. I am glad you are retaining a lawyer, as this is not a hopeless case. She lost a lot of credibility in claiming "neglect" if she has waited this long to bring up the unfortunate incident you reference. Most Judges will rather question her continuing to let you have your child as you were, if she was truly concerned that you were a neglectful parent.

More than likely, someone has told her she is "entitled" to something, or she has tried to apply for state benefits, and was told that you'd have to be paying support for her to qualify for them.

You should expect to be asked what you think would be a reasonable schedule for visitation. Your best tactic will be to ask the Judge to continue visitation and custody as has been occurring because your child is used to it. The Judge must consider above all what is in the best interest of the child. Your argument will be that keeping the schedule as is better for the child than what your ex has proposed, which is highly disruptive.

You may be asked about the incident you reference. Tell the truth, and be honest, but also remind the Judge that it hasn't happened since, and at the time your ex was not concerned about it and made no fuss.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

I was hoping for a more in-depth answer, as the court system is new to me, and I'm realizing that I will be asked to the stand. I am beyond needing a pep talk or to reiterate the actions already being taken.

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