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Hi I currently have a 2 year old daughter. The father and I…

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Hi I currently have a...
Hi I currently have a 2 year old daughter. The father and I have not been together since she was born. We currently have a Child Custody schedule made out already. It is: Week 1-Mon-Mom all day, Tues- Mom until 6 p.m. then dad will pick up, Wed-Mom will pick up at 8 am then Dad will pick up at 6 pm, Thurs-Mom will pick up at 8 am and dad will pick up at 6 pm, Friday-Mom will pick up at 8 am and keep daughter all weekend until Tuesday at 6 pm. Week 2: Mon- mom has all day, tues- dad pick up at 6 pm, wed-Mom picks up at 8 am and dad picks her up at 6pm, Thursday- Mom picks up at 8 am and dad picks up at 6 pm, Friday- mom picks up at pm and dad pick up at 6pm and keeps until either Sunday at night or Monday at 8 am. He only pays me $187 a month in child support. He lives with his parents with our daughter and I live with my parents with our daughter. He currently makes over $20,000 a year and I make maybe $4,000. She currently is on Medicaid so he has no hospital expenses to pay for her. Also I watch our daughter during the day while he works so he also has no daycare to pay for. He gets help from his mother to help get clothes and necessities. I am completely on my own and take of my daughters every need.The problem is he always lets me keep her during the week so he technically only has he on his weekends (every other weekend) He might keep her one day out of the week. It competely depends if he has plans. I would like to change our schedule to him having her just every other weekend and up the child support. I would love to get her into daycare and start a full time job/school. He won't allow me to put her into daycare even if we look for a good one together and he doesn't want to pay more child support. He sued me in the first place because he didn't want to pay me child support. It is a big mess and I think I make it too convenient for him. Help me! Do you think that will be a better schedule for my 2 year old. She needs a steady schedule!
Submitted: 6 years ago.Category: Family Law
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Answered in 4 minutes by:
3/14/2012
Family Lawyer: InformationForYou, Family Law Attorney replied 6 years ago
InformationForYou
InformationForYou, Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1,956
Experience: 18 years as a family law attorney, adjunct law professor
Verified

InformationForYou :

Where do you live?

JACUSTOMER-fmr74sx9- :

Omaha, NE

Customer :

?

InformationForYou :

Sorry, I am online much of the day, but not 100% of the time. I apologize. I have some follow up questions:

InformationForYou :

a) is there a current court order? I know you said you have a schedule, but is that in a written agreement, a court order, both a written agreement AND a court order or just an understandingyou two have?

InformationForYou :

b) if it is an agreement, when was it signed? if it is a court order, when was it entered?

InformationForYou :

c) if a court order, at the time the order was entered was he also living with his mother and letting you take her during the week so that he had technically only weekends then as well?

Customer :

Our chat says it is closed but I'm going to reply. It is a court order and we went through lawyers before when she was younger. We went to court and it was set when she was probably 4 months old and the process was finalized maybe a year later? We both agreed at the time but now that it has been some time I'd like to have it changed. He said he would fight me on it if I changed anything. He was living in our townhome we both lived in but I had already moved out and by the time it was completely finalized he was already living with his parents. I've been keeping her a lot during the weeks the whole time. Even when we were going through our lawyers, He would ask me to watch her or he would allow me to keep her.

Customer :

Thing is I had a lawyer who was $2500 down and $200 an hour and I have spent over $3000 in the whole process. For a single mom...that is tough to do. I definently can't afford that again and was thinking of a mediator but last time he did no show and it was court ordered. I'm just unsure of how to approach the situation if I did want to change it. We are both great parents but she is not a baby anymore and I'd like to be able to get her into daycare so I am able to have a day job. It is quite complicated because he is not willing to change the schedule or pay a higher child support if I had her during the weekdays. I offered maybe one night during the week as well if he wanted to keep her.

Customer :

He already lets me have her literally 3 or always 4 days out of the week already but refuses to make it official. I just would like to have things set in stone and be allowed to feel comfortable putting her into daycare and having a job without him creating problems or having me miss work. It would be much easier for everyone and I told him he could come see her if he wanted as well. I don't want to take her away from him or have him think he is doing a bad job but in order for anyone to get anywhere we have to make sacrifices but I want him involved 100% with her. So, pretty much I just need to know the best way about going to get a schedule change without a mess or huge money loss!

Customer :

Mind you...When i drive to get her in the morning it takes 30 minutes to get her and 30 minutes to get back home. That won't work if I have a job and she is in daycare. When he gets her she is just on his way home from work so he doesn't go out of his way to really get her.

InformationForYou :

Your only option is to file for a modification with the courthouse. I realize you don't want to have a huge fight for emotional and financial reasons, but if he didn't show up for mediation last time and you know he is resistent to the schedule-change, you probably don't have a choice. Typically when a child ages, having a lot of flips in the schedule is not continued onward. It is very hard for everyone (activities, school, etc.).

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InformationForYou, Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
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Experience: 18 years as a family law attorney, adjunct law professor

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