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My husband lives in Louisiana, I live in Virginia with my children,

one of which is his...
My husband lives in Louisiana, I live in Virginia with my children, one of which is his. Long story short, I moved here to go to school & have my parents help out with my kids, he followed a month after. Things weren't working out for him as far as employment, so he left us to go back to Louisiana in April, after four months of living here. Well, I have custody of our son through the state of Virginia because I was fearful he would come back & try to take him to Louisiana. Months later, we're on rocky ground & there's talk of divorce going back & forth. I feel he abandoned us but he sees otherwise. He's making threats telling me he's going to pay whatever money it takes to get a lawyer that knows the judge back in Louisiana & take my son away from me. The ultimate question is can he do that? That's my biggest fear in all this. We've talked about trying to make things work & having us move back to Louisiana, but I'm afraid it's just so he can have my son there in a state where I don't have custody. Is that order only good in the state of Virginia? And wouldn't he have to come here to have a case heard since this is where the order was granted? They have a stable home, I'm a full-time student, my daughter is doing great in school & my son is developing quite well. I'm not rich but they want for nothing. I'm just worried that if I don't go back to him, he's gonna do everything he can to take my son away from me, but we can't fix what went wrong between us. Thank you in advance for your help, really.
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Answered in 2 minutes by:
1/1/2012
Samuel II
Samuel II, Attorney at Law
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 27,011
Experience: General practice of law with emphasis in family law.
Verified

Samuel-II :

Hi

Customer:

Good morning

Samuel-II :

If you have a VA court order, and that is where you live, then he will need to follow up in VA.

Samuel-II :

Unless, as you say, you relocate to Louisiana

Samuel-II :

Then the Order can be modified there.

Samuel-II :

As it stands, it would be difficult for him to have any changes made.

Customer:

Just wondering, why would that be difficult for him?

Samuel-II :

Because he would need to be in VA to do it and also because you have established a good life for your child, as it appears. Therefore, no basis for him to have anything other than visitation in the eyes of the VA court

Samuel-II :

So, if he were to file in VA for a modification, the court would evaluate where he lives, the distance from the child, etc

Samuel-II :

and perhaps grant him some visits that include say holidays or a few weeks in the summertime

Samuel-II :

But, as I stated, if you return to Louisana, then the jurisdiction can be changed

Samuel-II :

So you may be correct. It could be a ploy to get you back to Louisana so he can make custody changes.

Customer:

Would that be granted for him if he remained a resident of Louisiana? He's flat-out told me in conversation that he wants the kids in his life, close to him & I'm "just part of the package that they come in"

Samuel-II :

He may be able to have visits, yes

Samuel-II :

But it would be up to the VA court

Samuel-II :

VA holds jurisdiction. You were wise to file and get that Order from VA

Customer:

And the court would decide who's financially responsible for getting our child back & forth to him for visitation, if granted as such, correct? So what you're saying is unless he comes here, I shouldn't be as worried as I am that he's going to get my son...I'm sorry but that's the one thing that scares me in telling him we should just go our separate ways.

Samuel-II :

You have no worries that he can move the matter to Louisana as long as you reside in VA

Samuel-II :

Yes, a court would decide who pays for the transporation of the child for visits.

Samuel-II :

Sometimes it is shared

Samuel-II :

Other times, the non custodial parent pays.

Samuel-II :

It depends on the finances of both parents

Samuel-II :

Also you have going for you the home environment you have established. If it is solid, a court will not change that

Samuel-II :

 


If you have further questions, you may post them here and I will continue to assist. Otherwise, even if you have a JA Subscription, Please ACCEPT my answer as that is the only way I get credit for my time and information. Thank you

Customer:

Regardless of the fact that we live with my parents, I hope. You really have put my mind at ease this morning & I greatly appreciate your help. I will revisit the conversation if I have any other questions. Thank you so much & Happy New Year!

Samuel II
Samuel II, Attorney at Law
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 27,011
Experience: General practice of law with emphasis in family law.
Verified
Samuel II and 87 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 5 years ago
When you said he has to follow up in VA, he can still file a motion for modification from LA...or does he have to come here to do it? Also, he never received any mail here although he changed his address...he's now saying I can't prove he was here. His job applications, a signed application to rent a home, & the record of his job interview should be sufficient, yes? I was also thinking, if need be, the credit card his mother used to purchase his plane ticket in January '10, plus the flight manifest from US Airways for that date & whether or not he was on the plane. Can I bring up the fact that he spent time in rehab while we were together? I know they operate with strict confidentiality, but can that information be court-ordered as well?

Hi

 

He will have to go to VA to file or have a local attorney in VA do it for him. It is not something he can do over the phone.

Yes, all of that information is sufficient evidence that he was changing his address to VA. And, yes, you can bring up the rehab. If you have an attorney that information may be subpoenaed

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Customer reply replied 5 years ago
I'm now being told he can use the fact that I'm a full-time college student against me....can I lose custody of my son because of that?? I go to school during the day while he's in daycare. When I get out of school we go home. I'm not understanding this but I'm scared all at the same time...

Hi

 

Not likely. What is the difference if you are in school or at work?

The fact that you are trying to Enhance yourself with education for better employment which is in the best interests of your child is more of a benefit for you than anything.

Someone is filling your head with nonsense.

If you have further questions, you may post them here and I will continue to assist. Otherwise, even if you have a JA Subscription, Please ACCEPT my answer as that is the only way I get credit for my time and information. Thank you

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Samuel II
Samuel II
Samuel II, Attorney at Law
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 27,011
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Experience: General practice of law with emphasis in family law.

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