Thank you for your follow-up.
Ma'am, you are not "bothering" me, I am truly happy to assist you with your question. Please do not ever feel as if your concerns are a bother, as they are obviously important to you.
1) if I am contacting him, and he is replying back to me and returning my text messages, then can he still get a restraining order, if he himself is replying to me ?
That very much depends on the response. If he is responding and stating that he no longer wishes to be in touch, and you proceed to contact him further, even if he does respond it does make it more likely to the courts that the communication is unwanted. Otherwise you do have a very strong claim that this is not communication that is unwanted or unconsented.
2) if the judge finds out that I was not served, will they postpone the hearing and wait until there is proof that I am served? also, does he get to choose if someone serves me personally or if I am served by mail?
Until you are properly served, there cannot be a hearing. A temporary order
will still be place limiting contact, but a final hearing in front of the judge will simply not take place. Yes, he can choose how you are served.
3) and finally, how can I prove to the judge that yes, I was bothering him, but I did in fact stop and I have stopped for example for 2 or 3 months, but he out of the blue after 3 months goes to get a Ro? how can I show proof to the judge that I have not contacted him during that time?
By showing possible phone records, or email history. If you can show that there is no recent contact, and you honored his wishes and left him alone, the court is less likely to grant a permanent order against you.