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Hello,Thank you for allowing us to assist you with this problem. I am not fully aware of what prior steps you have taken.
There is no minimum age requirement for a child to have summer visitation with the noncustodial parent.
There is no minor age he can refuse. In other words, you son must see his father until his is emancipated by age or law, so that would be 18 unless he is emancipated by a court sooner.
No it is not true he can decide at the age of 12. What you are referring to would be a change in custody. If the child wishes to live primarily with the other parent (noncustodial parent), then at the age of 12 the noncustodial parent can file a modification of custody petition in court and the judge will speak privately with the child and the judge can change custody by giving much weight to the child's custody (not visitation) desire.