1) I can quit due to my dad dying, or stress issues (I am on meds for acute anxiety, etc.) Would that be better for the court's impression? Really I hate my job and have lots of psch doctors saying it is better for me to quit.
If you can do the job despite the issues you have gone through the court may be reluctant. I can't guarantee what the court would say, but typically if you can work despite your conditions, the other side would have a case against you.
2.) We live in a very nice house (market value = $2mm), I could never live like this on my salary, of course. Also, I think that if my husband gets wind of this, he will start hiding money, etc. I need to know all his account numbers, etc., correct?
Yes, this is the time you need to become a detective and start making copies of all financial documents in order to "trace" hidden assets.
3) What is a legal separation? Is this an option if I htink he will change (he cheated on me).
Legal separate is the same as divorce, only major difference is you still retain marital status. It is typically used to allow you to continue using his medical insurance or other benefits that would go away if you were divorced. It is not an option to see if he will change his mind this would involve seeking marital counseling to see if you can save the marriage. Legal separation will only help to serve in dividing the marital property, address issues of support while you still retain marital status.
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