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Dimitry K., Esq.
Dimitry K., Esq., Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 41221
Experience:  I provide family and divorce law advice to my clients in my firm.
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I need to know the quickest and quietest way to fix this I

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I need to know the quickest and quietest way to fix this: I adopted two girls in Arizona in '05. Their biological mom now lives in Fla and we now live in Penn. I can't get her oldest to obey, even though I've tried all I know how to do. Will a simple custody work - the child is 16.
Thank you for your question. I am a Pennsylvania licensed expert.

I am a bit confused. Did the children get adopted away from you in 2005 or did you adopt them? If you adopted them, you want to send them back to her mother? Did the mother maintain her parental rights?
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

I adopted them from the courts of Arizona - they came as fost-adopt kids. Yes, I want to send my oldest (for now) back to her mother. She is facing a lot of emotional challenges and refuses to obey me. I think that her mother (coming from a messed up background) can be very useful to her right now.

Thank you for your follow-up.

You really cannot do that without a court order. Once you adopted the children, the parental rights of the biological parent were severed and transferred over to you. Should you send the child to her, you would still be deemed responsible, and in fact can even be then be charged for child neglect and abandonment.

The best and quietest way of handling this is to get a temporary guardianship petition filed and accepted by the courts from the mother, under which you agree to provide her with temporary custodial rights. Only once granted would you be able to send the child to her.

Good luck.

Edited by Dimitry Alexander Kaplun on 12/1/2010 at 5:29 AM EST
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
How long would that take? She is already 16, and her younger sister is bi-polar and requires special handling. I saw a mention of a custody thing. That won't work? The temporary will work for two years? (The custody thing was mentioned as the option to emancipation.)
Thank you for your follow-up.

If her mother files right away, she can usually get such an order within a month or two, whenever she gets in to see the judge. A "temporary" guardianship lable is a misnomer; it is only "temporary" until you choose to cancel it by going to court. That means that if you fail to ever cancel it, it will stay on until the child(ren) turn 18. Be aware that if that happens, you will be liable to the mother for child support.

Good luck.

Edited by Dimitry Alexander Kaplun on 12/1/2010 at 5:45 AM EST
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
I'm sorry, when would I be liable to her mother for child support? If it got cancelled or if she gets temporary guardianship? Would you be able to give me a ball park of the cost involved in a non-disputed situation, such as this? I can't support her - it's way complicated but I have to make up the loss in the budget for her going.
You would be liable to the mother for child support the moment guardianship, and therefore custody, would be transferred over to the mother. As the child would no longer be with you, the mother would be able to pursue you for support.

If guardianship would get canceled, then you would no longer be responsible for support. If this isn't being disputed, going to court and filing would be at most a few hundred dollars--you would be able to do this without an attorney.

Good luck.

Edited by Dimitry Alexander Kaplun on 12/1/2010 at 5:52 AM EST
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Really sorry - final question, I think. If the mom agrees that there can be no support at this time, or some nominal amount (I can't even work right now because I have to keep her under 24 hour supervision or reap the consequences), can I be held liable later? That is, as long as we agree that I'm too broke, and the judge sees the hole in my budget that has to be fixed, will that protect me from trouble?
Thank you for your follow-up.

Do not be sorry, I am here to assist.

If the mother does not pursue you at all, you do not have to pay. Should she decide to pursue you, your amounts would be placed under arrears which you would have to pay off later. Just be aware that if you fail to pay them, the arrears will collect interest, and if the debts go above $2,500, your US Passport would be revoked as you would not be permitted to leave the country.

Good luck.

Edited by Dimitry Alexander Kaplun on 12/1/2010 at 5:58 AM EST
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
But if we agreed, in writing, to not require any support at this time, would that cover me in retrospect? If it became an option later, would it start from point A, even though at point A we agreed not to?
Not it would not. You cannot legally waive your right to pay support.

Good luck.

Edited by Dimitry Alexander Kaplun on 12/1/2010 at 6:04 AM EST
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