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Ask Legalease Your Own Question
Legalease, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 16379
Experience:  13 years experience, divorce & custody issues, protective orders, child abuse issues
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What are the most important things to do and not do when taking

Resolved Question:

What are the most important things to do and not do when taking care of a child so I can prove I am a good parent in order to get custody of my 4 year old daughter. I lost custody of her temporarily because of slight mental instability. Afterward I was on 15 different psychological medications which I think did not improve my stability. Recently my psychologist said my problems are caused by not prioritizing and trying to do too much.

Please call me at (XXX) XXX-XXXX I live in Fresno, CA
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Legalease replied 6 years ago.

Hello. We do not actually provide legal "advice" or services to customers as if you were an actual client through this website. This is a question and answer forum where I can tell you what the legal criteria in California is that a court uses to determine where a child will be placed. Keeping this in mind, would you like me to continue with this Q & A session with you and let you know what CA legal requirements are in this situation and you can fill me in a bit more of the details of your own situation and I can give you some suggestions?




Customer: replied 6 years ago.

I would like to know what the California legal requirements are.

A social worker at the hospital when my child was born gave my husband full custody of my daughter probably because I was absent minded. I had a lot of problems and stress before and when I was in the hospital. I did not know how to take care of my baby because she was my first baby. The nurses complained I was not producing enough breast milk and my baby was hungry. Later I was producing more milk and supplementing with formula but my mother and my husband were not patient with me and complaining about my breast feeding.

6 months later, I thought I really had 50% custody since there was no court order

and demanded my fair time with my daughter which my husband promised earlier. He called CPS and complained about my tiny cottage in PA that I did not finish fixing up although we had rented a nearby apartment in which we would stay much of the time.

In2009 in Fresno Court, My husband got temporary full custody of my daughter because he claimed my mental illness was disturbing her sleep which does not happen often. He claimed I was an abduction risk. Also,Once I think I was distracted and dropped my psychological pill in my daughters sippy cup (which was probably empty on the counter-top). He complained to CPS and my doctor that I was was trying to kill my daughter and him which was not true.

I went for a psychological evaluation and a mediator proposed 50% custody. , but my husband and my mother spoke against me in his evaluation and that I was off my medication. Do I need to be on medication?

I work full time.

Also I need information on how many bedrooms I need and what size residence.

If you have more questions call (XXX) XXX-XXXX


Expert:  Legalease replied 6 years ago.

Hello. I am going to be perfectly honest with you and tell you that the issues with the medication are hurting you here and will continue to hurt you in a big way. If you are required to take medication by your doctors, then you should make sure that you take the medication and that you keep it out of the reach of your child or children. You should also try to talk to your own mother and get her on your side in this matter -- when a judge sees a mother testifying against custody for their own child, that tells the judge a lot and really works against you in the grand scheme of actually being granted child custody here.


Overall, the CA courts consider all relevant factors when considering who ultimately gets custody of the children and they use a test set forth in the CA statutes called the "best interests" of the child test. The factors used to determine what custody arrangement is in the best interests of the child are as follows: parenting skills, living arrangements, mental and physical health of each parent, religious and cultural considerations, need for continuation of a stable home environment (not bouncing the children back and forth between the parents every few years if it can be avoided), whether or not the custodial parent grants the opportunity for the other parent and extended family members are given the opportunity to interact with the child, adjustment to school and community, parental use of excessive discipline, and evidence of parental drug and alcohol use.


In order to get to the bottom of all of these issues in a hotly contested custody case, the court might appoint a guardian ad litem / custody investigator to actually investigate all of these items and report back to the court regarding what the guardian feels is an acceptable custody arrangement. All of the above factors and any other relevant factors will be considered in this determination. While having their own bedrooms might help out here in this situation, that fact will not be the main factor when the judge determines if you can have custody of the child returned to you in this situation.


If you can show that you have overcome your medication issues and you can show strong, positive aspects on many of these factors, while at the same time trying to show that your ex is weak on many of these issues, then you may have a chance of regaining custody -- but I will be truthful here when I tell you that it will probably be a long process and you will probably have to slowly move from your visitation rights into a more of a custodial relationship over time.


I hope that giving you this information helps.




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