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Jack R.
Jack R., Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 6147
Experience:  OH/TX Mediator and Attorney dealing with Family, Child, and Divorce Law
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I have been raising my grandson since birth after my daughter

Customer Question

I have been raising my grandson since birth after my daughter abandoned him at birth and his biological father is unknown, now after 5 Years she is petitioning the courts for her child back she has not been all that involved with him only for the past year still goes 3 to 4 days without calling and up to 2 weeks, however we have now moved out of Juvenile and Domestic court in the commonwealth of virginia and she has appealed several times and now we are in higher courts, ( Roanoke County Civil Court) I have an attorney and my grandson who has always known me as mommy has his Guardian Ad lit em but he is starting to ask alot of questions because my daughter is telling him I am not his mommy, I recently left my job of 23 years in the hospital and relocated out of state to Maryland due to stress overload and remarried. My daughter is telling him that my husband and I do not love him and we really don't want him in our house and that I stole him he is very confused and my attorney fees are escalating thru the roof top after paying 2500.00 and he is charging 150.00 an hour and we are back in court on May 26,2010..This is not that she wants the child back as sad as what it is it is a money scheme and tax deduction and only paying 139.00 a month in child support in which I carry his life, medical dental vision as well as provide for us he is so confused and in counseling the courts are already granting extended visitation he is in a elementary school and in pre-k and has already missed 43 days this year due to this garbage..Is there anyway I can counter sue for time lost from work mental and emotional abuse along with the expenses she has costed me and in turn has taken away from this child? Also what is my chances of not losing this lil man after I have had him all his life everyone says it would be extremely detrimental on both of us to split us up now not to mention she has a passed criminal record for embezzlement and cannot hold a job and is only a cafeteria worker for a few hours a day and would never be able to carry his insurance. But she knows how to work the system, his daycare and school says they can definately tell where he has been and who has had him when he returns from visitation he is uncontrollable and acts out, hitting kids and not following directions. Please help This is a lil one that is truly my world and has gotten thru a tragic divorce after 23 years of marraige and when everyone walked out I was left just holding an infant who we have gotten extremely attached over the 5 years of his life. He has extreme insecurity and trust issues she is telling him all types of lies where her four wheel drive buddies is his aunt and uncle and they are no kin at all. I am suppose to have unlimited contact with him in which when I tell her to have him call she never does or he is resting or sleeping...None of her court orders are followed but they just keep on giving in....
Recently after going thru circuit court the judge is still leaning on reuniting them even though he gets on the phone and tells me he wants to come home and now he has a red mark across his face and neck and on his back, she leaves him in the car while going into a store to purchase cigarettes with the keys in the car, constantly playing with his emotions when he told my youngest daughter the other night to please take him with her or he wanted to go back home and then my oldest daughter the babys mother husband said well if he wants to go home then pack his clothes and send him home and then she told him well lets go get your things ready and he jumped up with joy and said yes and then she came back up the hall and said no your not going home...I cannot get thru to this judge we go back in august and the past two times doesn't look good I have insurance and mine and my husband salary are pretty good and she cannot hold a job very long due to past criminal record for embezzlement and a high school drop .And I now find out my daughter's lawyer and the circuit court judge use to practice together in there own law firm I still say conflict of interest my attorney disagrees.
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Jack R. replied 7 years ago.

A court's first inclination is to reunify mother and child where possible e.g. until such time as the mother is declared an unfit parent. In many cases where custody is contested the result is the mother is entitled to visitation and residential or primary custody remains with the relative. A judge will not place a child knowingly into a bad situation. You and your attorney must present the facts and information in a manner which convinces the judge that placing the child with the mother is wrong.


There is no conflict of interest as long as the judge was not practicing in the same firm as daughter's attorney when the case was initially filed. A judge can decide to excuse himself if he cannot render an unbiased opinion in the case.



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