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Roger, Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 31768
Experience:  BV Rated by Martindale-Hubbell; SuperLawyer rating by Thompson-Reuters
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Im going to a custody case on Dec 15. I have pretty much allow

Customer Question

I'm going to a custody case on Dec 15. I have pretty much allow us to settle out of court on custody issues. However, he isa ctive duty and my son isfive. He has not been there the whole five years of his life. Once the up his child support he wanted joint custody and visitation. For the summer he wants 6 week visitation with his son. I said that was fine because he lives in California and I live in VA. However, I have my issues is that this a very drastic thing for my son and I belive at least for the year 2010. It should be 3 weeks and 3weeks. Not a full six weeks. My son has never been away from me that long. In addition he is asking in the event that he gets deployed that his mother and his wife get visitation. His mother gets invovled in the middle of everything and the minute me and Kevin have a disagreement she stop calling her grandson. However, I do allow him to go see her, but I dont think I should obligated by a court order. As far as his wife, my son has only met her 1 time
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Roger replied 7 years ago.

I think it is a good idea to split up the visitation in smaller blocks for the first year to allow your son to get used to doing this.


Also, the new wife and grandmother have no visitation rights to your child under the law. If the father is not there, my suggestion is that your son not be sent out there without the parent.


You can agree to whatever you want, and if you can't agree, the judge will do what is in the child's best interest.

Roger and 3 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 7 years ago.
Than You for your reply. As stated I live in Virginia and we had orginally settled the custody. He wans him to either come for six week straight or me pay for the sceond 3 weeks,. I'm getting child support in my last year fulltime in college and worki ng fulltime i do not have the money. I'm just afraid because I didnt even know he was getting married so I dont know her. My son is only 5. Also his grandmother is a good grandmother but if her son and I dont agree she will stop calling her grandson. I hope the judge does not obligate me to pay for the seocn d three wees or make him go for 6 weeks. I cant afford to pay and six weeks is to long. Everything was agreed upon but they just changed everything. I just want my son to be safe. However , he nees to have a relationship with his father, but a gradual one since he has not been there sonce he was 2. What do think? Very Nervous and I cant sleep, I keep having these anxiety attacks over this stuff.
Expert:  Roger replied 7 years ago.

I know it is easier said than done, but you have to trust the system. The judge is going to do what is in the child's best interest - botXXXXX XXXXXne. I think you make a reasonable argument that 6 weeks for a 5 year old who has never been away from you is a long time. This is especially true since it has been 3 years since the child has seen the father.


I believe the judge will understand your reservations. I also believe the court will see that you're willing to foster a relationship between your child and the father despite the fact that the father has been away for most of his life.


My advice is not to worry. The judge is going to do what is best for the child.