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LADY LAWYER, Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 6536
Experience:  Family Law Attorney
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Hello. I am going through child custody court on Monday and

Resolved Question:

Hello. I am going through child custody court on Monday and I am a wreck. My husband and I went through mediation last week and he is being pretty adamant about getting joint physical custody. I have been the primary caretaker for my son and my foster daughter that we were to adopt. I am trying to adopt, but my husband has now stop the procedure due to him not signing the release form of him adopting. He is not interested in adopting. He is just using her as a card as if this custody is a game. During the mediation, he said he would sign if I do 50/50. I said no. He then change his tune as to meet to continue mediation and then threaten me that he will spend every dime he has to win! I am afraid. This is all unfamiliar territory-frightening.... I love my son. I do everything for him. The cooking cleaning, the playdates, the entertainment, the doctors, the dentist appts-EVERYTHING. Will the judge really see through his ploy? He is very intelligent and has the appearance of a conservat
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  LADY LAWYER replied 8 years ago.



Do you or your husband have an attorney? How much do you make at your job? What about him? Do you own a home that you are currently living in?

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
yes, I have an attorney. I am a realtor, but there is no income. Yes we do own the home I am living in. He is paying the mortgage, but i am on the title. We live in California. His income is over 10,000 a month to my 619.00 from foster care. I do have the potential to make money, i have a in marketing.
Expert:  LADY LAWYER replied 8 years ago.



Okay thanks. Is there any reason you see for why a judge would not grant him 50% custody?

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
We did have a restraining order in place temporarily for physical & verbal abuse. He was released of that due to not enough physical abuse. In my declaration I state several he/said she/said incidents regarding him grabbing my son. speaking to him in a violent way, I speak of my husband depressions, going around the house saying he is at deaths door, his body is dying. He also was viewin pornographic material but erased the laptop & disassembled the computer in the house. I believe he was viewing porns when watching the children and on that occasion, the adoptee child cut her hair off in fron with scissors.
Expert:  LADY LAWYER replied 8 years ago.



Okay, these are good reasons that you need to make the judge aware of. But be prepared for him to give some percentage of custody to the father, even if it's not 50%. The judge will definitely be able to see through his antics--if he is even allowed to talk. These judges have seen so much that there is really little that can get by them. You can still move forward with the adoption without your husband, but it will be alone after you are divorced. The issue may be whether he will have any responsibility for her at that point. You really need to talk to your attorneys about trying to settle on something so he will sign that petition, as well as the ramifications if he doesn't. That would be my main concern at this point. It appears that temporary spousal support will probably be awarded in this case. You will then be expected to use your degree and become employed. I am sure your attorneys are very capable--I know this is scary stuff though! Sounds like the kids are really lucky to have you as their mom.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.

What I was wondering was would a judge grant him physical? I want my son to live with me. I am willing to give him the majority of holidays, drive him to him if need be. What is the California family law on these kid of situations?

Expert:  LADY LAWYER replied 8 years ago.
As far as child custody, like most states, the standard for child custody determinations in California is the overall best interest of the child with an emphasis on ensuring the "health, safety, and welfare" of the child and "frequent and continuing contact" with both parents absent child abuse, domestic violence, or where the contact would not be in the best interest of the child as provided in California Family Code Section 3011 (See also California Family Code Sections 3011, 3020, 3040, 3080). CA does favor that the mother gets primary custody of the children.
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