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Ask Dr. Norman Brown Your Own Question
Dr. Norman Brown
Dr. Norman Brown, PhD
Category: Dream Interpretation
Satisfied Customers: 1206
Experience:  40yrs interpreting dreams & connecting conscious & unconscious minds
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Dr. Brown. I just had the worst nightmare and I can't seem

Customer Question

Hi Dr. Brown. I just had the worst nightmare and I can't seem to shake it. Can you help?
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Dream Interpretation
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
I dreamt that both of my parents died on the same day in the hospital. I watched them say goodbye to each other and I said goodbye to my dad but I think my moms death came more sudde than expected. Both of my parents are dead in real life. My mom passed away suddenly when I was 20 and my dad suffered from liver disease and died quickly after only a few weeks in the hospital about 8 months ago.
Expert:  Dr. Norman Brown replied 2 years ago.
Before jumping to any conclusions I want to approach your dream gradually. Usually some of the key messages of a dream are found by pursuing the SURPRISES in it. ONE surprise is probably that the dream came to you just now, when it came. since you are 8 months into grieving your father's death. It's worth considering that this dream may play a role in guiding you through the grief process with your loss of your father.
There seems to be no surprise in the manner of your parents' death, since your mother DID die suddenly (how long ago? compared to your present age) and you did get a chance to say goodbye to your dad. Is it true that you did not get a chance to say goodbye to your mom?
One of the normally significant results of having your second parent die is that you can have feelings about becoming an orphan. The fact that your dream CHANGED your real history by having them both die at the same time could be a way of emphasizing that you have "suddenly" become an orphan. When a dream presents a scene as "sudden" and/or "unexpected" it produces strong emphasis on what is happening: You're becoming an orphan, especially with respect to your mother, to whom you didn't get to say goodbye. Have you ever contemplated what it means to you that you are now an "unparented inner child?"
It's quite normal that you would need to revisit your grief process over your mother loss at this time. And perhaps you actually need to give some special attention to communicating with your deceased mother, such as by writing her a letter and doing something with it that could symbolize sending it to her (like burying or burning it).
It's interesting, because Not Necessary, that you would watch them "say goodbye to each other." How did each of them seem to feel when they said that goodb ye? I imagine it was a very tender, loving moment between them, do you imagine that too? It's also a bit unexpected, because if they were dying at the same time, it would be normal to assume that they would "cross over" together, and their marital intimacy would be uninterrupted by death. Yet in fact their deaths were separated by (??) years--so it would be possible that their goodbye scene included an "until we meet again," as in the "Happy Trails" themesong in (was it the ***** ***** TV show?). it seems as if they're affirming their pact together, and NOT that they'll be separated forever but united for Eternity instead. Does it feel that way to you?
I'm trying to lead you into a looser, less rational and more emotional type of thinking, where you are more likely to find the useful messages your dream is portraying without the words that only your conscious mind can supply. So PLEASE, if any of my imagination-guesses feels awkward or wrong to you, PUT YOUR OWN FEELING STORY INTO THE SCENE INSTEAD.