You are not going to believe this but earlier today I was praying about you and your dream, and thanking God for helping me with your interpretation, but I really love to hear back on how the interp fits with the real life of the dreamers, and I hadn't from you so I prayed I would, and you did! I was so happy to see your reply! So thanks for that.
I am really sorry to hear what you have had to go through, and I agree, having a "victim" mentality is not productive and a tough place to be in.
Going all the way back to your baby boy, he is your outcome of this legal battle you are in, he is the power that you have gave birth to, power to overcome the victim position that a person can so easily slide into, but then can get stuck there.
That is a big step you made when you said, if I am acting like a victim then I want to change. AMEN! That is what it takes for any positive change, awareness and being willing, so good for you, be proud of yourself for that.
The world is a harsh place, and I am sorry to say it will only get worse my friend...you want the truth because the truth is what will set you free. BUT that is okay if the world is getting worse, why? Because you can heal and grow and get a solid foundation so you will be able to handle all the problems, negativity, and bad in the world.
What happened to you is not right, it is not fair, but it did happen and you are dealing with it. It is over with now and in your past, and like you said you want the past over. I don't blame you. I have just went through a healing journey myself for about 2 years and at the end I was able to close the doors on it and it feels amazing! I had a horrific childhood and lost some family members and my best friend to sum up a very long story....did I deserve it? No, was I a victim? YES. But I refused to remain one...I came to terms that the past was over, I could only do what I can do for the moment I am in. I turned to God, he had me feel, grieve, cry, get angry, get anxiety, get depressed, relive the memories that needed to be felt, dealt with and then forgiven and move on. It was the hardest thing I have ever done, very painful, I will not lie to you, and some of my darkest hours I have ever faced in my life (I am 48) but seriously it is oh so worth it! The freedom you feel after you shut those doors of the past, you feel like you can fly!
I don't know your spiritual beliefs of course but I feel God is detrimental to anyones recovery from anything.
The lawyer is right in the aspect of listening, it is a very good attribute to have. I have recently just realized that about 3/4's of the questions asked by people are not answered right. We have a bad habit of not listening that well. Test this and see, listen real careful of what people ask and how people reply to the questions, you will be surprised. Have you heard the saying God gave us 2 ears and one mouth, 2 ears to listen 1 mouth to talk.
I am not trying to lecture or push religion on you at all, I am not religious at all, only spiritual, and keeping it real with the truth and want to see you healed.
You sound like a strong person and I can tell you have what it takes to overcome all of what has happened and what is pending in your life, if you give this all over to God and allow him to lead you and support you through this you will be a overcomer and a whole happy, productive person.
God does love you very much and does not want you to be a prisoner to anxiety, abuse, etc...that is not from God, he is for you and not against you, and wants the best for you, as want the best for our children, as we are his.
I am here for you, for whatever I can help with, just let me know and I will do my best.
Thanks again for filling me in and I have been and will continue to pray for you.
Blessings to you always.
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