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Law Educator, Esq.
Law Educator, Esq., Lawyer
Category: Criminal Law
Satisfied Customers: 118796
Experience:  Attorney with over 20 years law enforcement, prosecution, civil rights and defense experience
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I believe someone has or is trying to file a harassment complaint

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I believe someone has or is trying to file a harassment complaint with the police agaisnt me.
-Could you explain your situation a little more?
-What is your specific question?
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
A girl a saw once a year ago, we had sex and we video taped it, it was consentual. She also stole a little money from me. Over the past year I would ask her for it once and awhile, she explained she didnt have it and i would let it go.

Finally, one day recently, i asked her for it again and she went off on me and was verablly abusive. I get upset and told her she needs to give me back the money she took or Id let her all her freinds see the sex video we made (again when the video was made, it was consentual), I didnt really mean I would, I was just upset and wanted my money back, and I told her no one has seen it, juts give me back what you stole from me and its all forgotten.

We texted back and forth for awhile and all she could do was turn the whole thing around as if I was harrassing her, etc. I told her, just pay me back, thats all I want.

After that i was just going to let it go, then..

The other day I got a very threating voice mail from her boyfreind telling me he knew who i was and where I was and they went to the police and a lawyer and that Im in big trouble. Again, making me upset, I said if i dont get my money returned Id contact my own lawyer and we could have it out in court. I then again forgot about it, I have no desire to do anything to this girl in any way, i was just trying to get my money back.

This morning, I recieved a voice mail from an officer from asking me to call him back. When I looked up the number he gave, it was from the "Domestic volience" unit? Now this really doesnt make sense because I never threten her in any way and havent even seen her in a year and dont even know where she lives!

Not sure if I explained the whole thing well enuff, but Im wondering what I should do. I just want it to go away.
If the Domestic Violence unit is calling you, then you would need to get yourself an attorney before speaking to them and do not go in to speak with them without your attorney. If the DV unit is handling this, she is making an accusation of more than just harassment. At this point you are going to have to decide whether to just let the money go or actually do something, like sue her over the money. If you don't want to sue her, then you need to stop calling her for the money and stop texting her about the money and do yourself a favor and destroy the video and send her the pieces of it so she knows it has been destroyed. If not, even if she makes up a DV charge against you, if you get arrested it is going to cost you to get out of it.

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Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Thank you for your response...

At this point she can just keep the money, its not worth it anymore, so let her keep what she stole, and I HAVE stopped texting and asking for the money.

You said "If the DV unit is handling this, she is making an accusation of more than just harassment."
Like what? Ive only been in the presence of this girl once, a year ago, dont know where she lives and have only been texting her. Could it have to do with the video, but how would that come under DV?

I, of course, would not speak to them without an attorney, but I dont want to spend money on a lawyer. I already destroyed the video, which she never saw only heard about, its gone, dont even have any pieces.

She really doesn't have evidence against me except text messages, and most all of these text messages where me asking her to explain why she stole from me and that I was willing to work it out, I never once physical threatened her or made any extreme threat, but I did send some messages to her friends on facebook, only saying I heard there was a XXX tape,etc... through all this i was just trying to get her to give me my money back, that's it.

Is that enough evidence for them to come and arrest me? Over some text messages and vague messages to a few friends on facebook?

What if I just ignore the phone call from the officer and never contact her again, will that be the end of it?

Thank you for your time.
The officer will not just let this drop, he will have to follow through on the complaint. She may be making a claim of electronic communications harassment, which he could be handling because of your prior relationship. Under the electronic communication harassment the law is that communications that have no purpose other than to annoy or harass and the party has told you the commumications are not wanted.

You are going to need to talk to the officer at some point.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
But you said not to talk to the officer without a lawyer, and I dont want to pay a lawyer to talk to him with me. What happens if i just dont call him back?

I havent and I never plan to contact her again, but what is she trying to do by filing these compliants? I have not been talking to her at all!

He will call you back and if you do not respond, he will likely just put a warrant out for you. As far as filing the complaints against you, I do not know her motives other than to stop you from bothering her about the money.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
If I was to call him back now, what is he going to ask me? and do i have to answer all his questions? Is he going to ask me to go to the precinct ? Its far from where I live.

When he called is tone was very casual.

AND, did this girl have to show him reasonable evidence in order for him to contact me at all. where as a warrant will be issued for me if i dont respond?

How much evidence couls she have possibly showed him to trigger an arrest, it really wasnt that much beleive me.
You are free to stop answering questions from him at any time you like. He will be vague about his investigation many times. He would likely ask you to come into the station to talk. However, it may be he is just going to tell you to stop contacting her, and if that is it then you are done.

It doesn't take much in these cases for a victim to insist on a warrant because the police rather put the matter in court and have a court decide than make the decision on their own.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
So I dont have to answer his questions if i dont want too? WHat if he starts asking about the video, etc, how she stole the money, etc. What if he insists i have to come to there?

If I call him now, and you where me how would you handle it? I really have no desire to contact her, just want it to go away. But i feel answering any questions might draw me into this deeper. Im just afraid to call.

You have a right to remain silent and you have no obligations to answer his questions. If he insists on you coming in, then you really should get a lawyer, whether you want to spend the money or not, to protect your rights.

I would not contact the girlfriend again. If you are that worried about it, call the officer ask what it is about, don't answer any questions about the incident and if they tell you to come in, tell them you will have to find a lawyer and you will make arrangements to come in and you will call them back and then hang up.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
would it be wise to maybe give him some info such as "she stole money from me, i didnt harrass, i was just trying to get her to return it, but now I willing to let it go if she is"
You can deny everything, you can tell the you were not harassing her you were just trying to get her to repay money she stole from you, but I would not say much more than that. You can tell the officer you will stop contact if that is what they are telling you to do.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Ok, so I will call him, ask him what its about, say no, not true, deney eveyrthing, just rying to get her to repay money she stole from me. period, and that I will stop contacted her if thats what you are telling me to do.

like that?

and then if they insist its more then that and i have to come in, then say then Ill have to contact my attorney and get back to you and hang up?
That is fine and if they want you to come in tell them you will contact your attorney and then call them back to make arrangements to come in.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
ok thank you for your help...

....but if i have to go in with a lawyer it cost me money and it costs her nothing!

Final question: If the officer is calling me, that means she filed a complaint agaisnt me correct? ..and so he is just calling to just see if there is anything to it? Weather or not the officer decides to take this further would depend on what, any evidence she may have shown him, or something else? I mean if she just went in and complianed about me, is he really going to make me follow through with a lawyer... wouldnt he have to feel she has a case if he makes me have to go in?

The choice on the spending for a lawyer is yours, if you get charged it will cost you even more.

If the officer is calling she did file a complaint and the officer is at the least investigating the matter. The officers actions depend on the evidence she showed him and what evidence you can provide to counter her arguments. He doesn't have to feel she has a case to get you in to try to get you to admit to things, sometimes things that you may not even be aware you are admitting to.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
o man, I cant beleive this has gone this far.

The only evidence should could have is the text messages, which arent that bad, the worst thing I said was "Just give me back the money you stole and this will be over" I made reference that I had made a video in the text messgae though, but I can deney that since she has no evidence of it, and the messages on her facebook where in my name, theres no way to prove that was me, and also those messages to her freinds where that harsh anyway.

She has no evidence of a video, although i showed her some screen shots online to prove it was real, but she would of had no way to print or show those, nor would she i think.

IF i dont talk and answer the officers questions and say Ill need a lawyer doesnt that make me sound guilty? If I just talk to him to give me side of the story is that more liekly to make him just dismiss the case?

What is the best thing I can do to get him to just dimiss and close this case?
Look, call and find out what he has to say. There is nothing much you can do until you talk to him to see where it is going. The best thing to say is no threats were ever made and the only reason you were contacting her was to get her to repay money she stole from you.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
ok, and if i dont call back at all I would DEF be arrested? ..or could this just get lost in a pile of other cases?

If I do call, can i wait until tomorrow, or is it the sooner i call the better it looks?
If you don't return the call, there is no way to know whether or not he will put out a warrant, no way of knowing because there is no way of knowing why he called, you would just be taking a chance with that.

As far as calling, usually the sooner the better looks like you have nothing to hide.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
ok, and last question... I guess hes going to tell me that this girl has filed a complaint, but does he have to tell me what evidence she showed him to back this up? or can I ask?
He does not have to tell you anything about his evidence at all, but you can ask when you deny it.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
I apppreciate your time, I will call him now...

If he asks me for my address or any other personal info do i have to give it to him?

worst case sererio is what, i get convicted on harrasment or whatever, what is the pentaly for that? I have a clean record, not even a parking ticket.
No problem. If he asks for your address you are going to have to give it to him. Harassment, generally they would let you reduce it to a violation and pay a fine.

Do not forget to click accept to release your deposit.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
I called, got voice mail, left my name and number very causaly... I will gladly hit accept but how do i contact u again if i need you, since u are already know about my case
You can just reply to this thread again, it will remain open even after you click accept.

Law Educator, Esq. and 5 other Criminal Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Ok, thank you sir.
Thank you.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
I left a voice mail on the main DV at 2pm with my name and number, etc... no word back, is that a good sign or bad?
It really doesn't mean anything other than he is likely either not working or busy. He will call you back eventually, if not, don't worry about it.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Oh, so he may not even call back? You may be right cause he didnt sound to serious when he called, maybe just wanted to ask me not to contact her again like you said
If he doesn't call back and you don't contact her again, then I wouldn't worry about it.
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
That would be great! I DEF wont contact her again... can she go to a lawyer and file a case agaisnt me? Im not sure she will since that would cost her quite a bit of money Im assuming
If you don't hear anything else, let it go.