I have three children...twins ages 17, 17 who live with me…

Nice to meet you online Karen.  Let's start at the beginning.  Is there an order, or a domestic contract or separation agreement, that governs the issues of support and extraordinary expenses?

The site is US based, and you're on the Canada Law category.  I'm an Ontario family law lawyer.

Your rights start with the Order, or separation agreement.  Do you have it handy to show me?

Yes, but I need to see it in order to properly help you.  We can talk about this all day, but if there's something in the order or contract I'm unware of on the topic, then my advice is for nothing.

I'm here.  I was on the phone with a client.  I'm in my office, answering questions here in my spare time too.

Here's how it generally works:

Firstly, the parents are to be exchanging their income information annually to have a discussion about payment of extraordinary expenses.  If you aren't already doing that, you will have to so you might as well start and ask for his.

Extraordinary expenses are those costs above and beyond the usual food, clothes, shelter, and transportation.  Reasonable post secondary education expenses also count as extraordinary, or Section Seven, or S.7, expenses.  The parents and child add up those anticipated costs and then decide how to divide it.

Before the parents decide on their share, they agree on how much the child will contribute.  Most judges believe that children should contribute something reasonable, as well as apply for student loans and grants, and  available scholarships and bursaries.  The child doesn't need to commit to working full time for the whole summer and putting every penny earned towards school but there should be something from the child.

Then look to see if there is any money In Trust for the child anywhere, or RESPs.  If there are RESPs then you look to see who "owns" them.  If the RESPs were accumulated during the marriage, then it's a marital asset, and if not already spoken for or divided then RESP money towards the student costs comes right off the top of that cost.

Then the parents divide what's left in proportion to their incomes.

Regarding support....

If the child is living at home during school, then there should be no residence or meal plan costs, and support continues to flow year round.  If the child is away from school and paying for residence / apartment and meal plan or groceries, then support does not flow during those months that the child is primarily away at school because you're already contributing towards the child's housing and food costs by paying towards those expenses.  So summers only, essentially.  Maybe another month if the child is spending the manor school breaks with dad.

Just so you know, there's also case law to say that child support for a biological child can be ordered to stop if the child has unilaterally rejected the paying parent.  It's not a slam dunk for sure, so if you had a family law lawyer working for you recently then ask that lawyer about it.

That's the nuts and bolts of it.  Does that all make sense?

Did you read what I wrote to you on support issues?