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Tom B.
Tom B., Barrister & Solicitor
Category: Canada Criminal Law
Satisfied Customers: 13
Experience:  25 years in practice.
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This is a complicated issue and there are obviously many

Customer Question

This is a complicated issue and there are obviously many underlying complexities, but I try to summarize the highlights of it.My younger brother (DH)is 15 years old (August 2001). He started dating his first girlfriend (TM) in early December 2016. It is believed his girlfriend is either 15 or 16 years old. TM had a previous boyfriend, who was DH's best friend. All three attend the same High school together, and are presently in Grade 10.None of us have access to DH's Facebook account. One day, he left his account open and my mother noticed a message conversation with a woman he labelled "My Sexy Lady". DH has not told any of us that he had a girlfriend.My brother, DH, is a virgin. It does not appear as though TM is a virgin. For the first few weeks, everything appeared generally normal legally. There were some questionable behaviour (saying I love you the day after they started dating) but nothing legally questionable. For the record, we are not against DH dating.A few days ago,TM asked my brother if she could see his penis. My brother was reluctant at first, but TM persuaded him to do so, even saying she would not share it with anyone because she loves him. My brother indicated he was uncomfortable but she eventually persuaded him to send another picture of his penis - when it was erect.This type of conversation continued throughout the next few days and nights, often continuing into the early morning hours. TM continued trying to convince himself to send her pictures of his penis while erect, often complimenting him on how it looks. Over the course of 3 days/nights, he sent at least 50 pictures of his penis to her. There might be more but we lost count. Some of the pictures also might be repeats (not a new picture each time).They also increasingly began talking about having sex and having DH lose his virginity to her. He at first told her he wants to wait until he is 20, then 16, and then she began talking him into having sex with her ASAP. DH is hesitant but TM says it will be fine because she loves DH.TM sometimes sends DH pictures of herself, but only face shots. DH has not appeared to so far try to heavily convince her to send pictures of her genitalia, and she has not done so.She has convinced DH to talk dirty to her and engage in verbal sex. She kept asking him to pleasure her sexually to the point where she becomes 'wet'. She also wants DH to masturbate and then send her pictures of his erect penis.TM at one point asked DH would he would do if he got her pregnant. DH said it will not happen because he will use protection. TM said she does not like the pill but is okay with condoms. TM wants to buy condoms for sex, but DH said he will do it. (We are unsure if he has bought condoms.) On the same topic later on, TM asked what he would do if the condom happened to break and he orgasmed inside her. He said he does not know and would be scared because he does not want to be a father before he graduates high school. She said that there is nothing to worry about and that he would be a great father if he wanted to be one.
Submitted: 9 months ago.
Category: Canada Criminal Law
Customer: replied 9 months ago.
We do not know what to do. We have not spoken with him about it yet. Is there something we can do with the police? We are all scared for him and want to protect him but do not know what recourse options we have to protect him. We all feel strongly that he is being sexually coerced, manipulated, and exploited.
Expert:  ulysses101 replied 9 months ago.

Hello, thank you for the question.

What province are you in?

When has all of this gone on? Are you sure that DH hasn't had sex with TM yet?

Most parents and older siblings would consider this to be "par for the course", minus the sending of genitalia photos. Since we're anonymous here, what's really on your mind?

And to answer the obvious question, he could potentially be charged with child pornography if he's sending pictures of his own penis to TM because he's a minor. That has to stop. I hope that none of those pictures showed his face as well in the same shot.

Customer: replied 9 months ago.
We are in Ontario. It has gone on exclusively through Facebook as far as we know. It is obviously impossible to say what happens offline and not around him. The messages recently sent suggest strongly they have not had sex.There is one picture that shows his face. None so far that we know of that include his face and genitalia in the same picture. Obviously though, it would not be hard to put 2 and 2 together.Does it matter if both are minors and she is trying to convince him?Our biggest concern is if she distributes them. She has told DH about her sex with his best friend and how she wants to make him jealous. We do not know if pictures were exchanged yet, but she did not allude to embarassing photos she wants to show him when they return to school. We do know that she said she was meeting with other guys who were flirting with her, and they had 'fun' together. We are concerned about what the photos might contain and want to know what the best method is to nip this in the bud. We obviously do not want DH to get in trouble for pornography, but are also concerned about his pictures now being distributed and possibly about his best friend's photos being distributed.
Customer: replied 9 months ago.
Would it also possibly be solicitation or contributing to an offense because she was asking for the photos? There are obviously so many grey areas to this.
Expert:  ulysses101 replied 9 months ago.

It's very arguably an offence for her to be soliciting the pictures. That could fall under a "luring a minor" charge. But this sort of thing happens every day, and I don't see charges being laid just for that.

You're the older brother? How old are you?

What do you really want here? Seriously, what's your goal? Let's be honest. Unless his face and penis are in the same picture then there's little to be concerned about on that issue.

Customer: replied 9 months ago.
It should not matter my age. I am of legal age. That should be irrelevant.I request this answer be marked finished so payment can be made, and a rating posted.Thank you for your answers, ulysses101.