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galentm, Bachelor's Degree
Category: Writing Homework
Satisfied Customers: 32
Experience:  Bachelor of English, Minor in Business. Current law student
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Customer Question

i need help with an essay in sociology, already done, just want correction
need help in a journal paper almost complete
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Writing Homework
Expert:  galentm replied 4 years ago.
I would be happy to provide corrections and feedback; can you post the document or a link to it?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.


I am going to type for you the fisrt one

it is regarding an essay in sociology




Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Expert:  galentm replied 4 years ago.

Yes I would be happy to provide corrections. You can copy paste it into this forum, or upload it somewhere such as and post the link.

Thank you

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Emmanuel Student ID 51291514 Page number

315 East 59 sty

Brooklyn, Ny 11203 Project number 050551

[email protected]



  1. On page 66, your textbook states that the family has the responsibility of socializing children to a basic understanding of societal norms. When that socialization fails, the parent(s) should be held accountable.





Children are first exposed to their families before they become aware of the society.


Hence socializing children is the primary responsibility of the family. Apparently they


get exposed to other social environments when they go to school , visits family member


or friends . However , the influence of family during the formative years of a child is an


important factor in understanding social norms.[s1] After reading this paragraph I am not sure where you stand on the assigned topic (listed above). I am also unclear why you are writing about this topic. Are you a counselor, a member of the clergy, involved in an organization such as Big Brothers, a police officer, an educator, or involved in some other field that would bring you into contact with children or young adults who have been improperly socialized?









There are different cultures in the world. Some parents are commonly responsible for the


process of primary socialization up to a certain age because children begin to be


influenced by other friends, teachers, or people outside of their family. During childhood


parents have control over the children which can help redirect them from bad behaviors.


One thing about when kids are younger is that they are unaware of good or bad


behaviors, which is the reason why parents should always be around them.[s2] This is interesting but actually belongs in your introduction as it is getting closer to you making a decision about whether or not parents are responsible for their children's behavior and when that responsibility ends. You also need to finish the though process by stating the socialization norm in your culture and what your perception of the norm in American culture seems to be.







One of the most important factor that may affect primary socialization is when children


Begin to disobey their parents. They begin to turn to " associates" which are people


outside of the family. These " associates " consists of friends, teachers and peer friends .


Children begin to make their own decisions such as their own curfews, people they hang


out with , music they listen and things they say . They want to acquire what you called


anticipatory socialization to prepare themselves for the future.[s3] You have now made your first claim. Parents may the first responsible party for socialization but then children eventually come under the influence of others. Now you need to find research (this is a requirement) that supports that claim. You can do this without getting into trouble by putting that research in quotation marks - see the end of this paper for proper ways to add in research. Next you have to acknowledge that people may not agree with this. For example many people think that if children have been given a strong enough basis (been taught properly before encountering these outside influences) they should be strong enough to ignore them. Then you need to find more research that shows just how strong peer influences really is.








Children start seeing new cultures and learn from them. This is actually the same as peer influence. Instead of this why not discuss video games or the influence television or the movies has on children. They acquire different types of


Norms and values which might or might not be like by the family. The parental control


Slowly declines and usually children often get redirect by their families from doing bad


things that they learned from other environments.


Even though the culture of the family is unmistakably followed during the early years but


with more and more exposure to others the process of socialization always change.[s4] Now find some research that supports the concept that television and the media have corrupted the values of children. Then acknowledge once again that many feel that if children were raised properly the effects of media would be minimal but show that much like peer influence these influences are difficult to refuse,







Overall parents are responsible for primary socialization during childhood , in school we


Learn other behaviors which needed to survive in life.


We know for sure at the beginning parents have control over the children , but when


they reach certain age they no longer listen to their parents . In my opinion the primary


education is very important and most likely to remain in an individual's life .[s5]







Please note the RTN on your record. I am returning your project ungraded. Please read my notes and comments throughout your paper. If I were to grade as submitted it would fail. I will give you an example for the Introduction and First Claim - you take it from there.


I. Introduction

A. Topic and opinion pick one side of the debate - for example - Parents should be held accountable for their children's socialization but only to a point (or do you feel this is forever?).

B. Reason why you chose this topic why have you chosen this topic - are you in law enforcement, are you a counselor, have you been a victim, or do you know someone, have you been a prisoner or do you know someone who has been? - for example - I have been a teacher for over 30 years and during that time I have witnessed those parents who have been very involved in their child's lives, meaning given them love, shelter, attention, and most importantly a strong moral and foundation as well as those who barely supply their children with enough food to survive.

II. First claim

A. Statement must be related to the topic - for example - Parents are the initial source of socialization skills for their children.

B. Support for the statement either personal experience of researched material that supports your statement - for example - For the first several weeks of a child's lives, a child is totally dependent on its caregiver for food, clothing, and shelter. Once a child reaches 6 weeks of age, the child may be sent to a daycare facility where others may begin attending to these biological needs as well. However, studies have shown that more than biological needs must be met during this crucial developmental period. Partridge, Devine, Hornstein, and Marsh (2001) stated that, " Consistent, nurturing, predictable, structured and enriching experiences in a safe environment during early childhood have a positive impact on brain organization and function, leading toward more empathetic, responsible, and fully functioning adults" (p 1).

C. Objections and refutation people do not agree with your claim - you must allow the other side room to voice their opinion and then provide research to show why they are incorrect. For example - Some parents feel that after a certain age, children are no longer their responsibility. For example, some parents feel that by age 7 or 8 the child can become what is known as a "latch key" child and be left unattended after school for hours. However there are laws to protect young children who are left unattended. According to, no child under the age of 12 should be left home unattended and there are many states including Colorado, Delaware, Kansas, Wisconsin, and Wyoming where that law is enforced. Other states such as Washington, Tennessee, South Carolina, North Carolina, North Dakota, Nebraska, and Maryland have laws with mandatory younger ages for leaving children alone.

III. Second claim

A. Statement

B. Support for the statement - researched

C. Objections and refutation - researched

IV. Third claim

A. Statement

B. Support for the statement - researched

C. Objections and refutation - researched

V. Conclusion

A. Restatement of topic

B. Restatement of main ideas


Please remember, I have given you the OUTLINE, you must take the ideas from this technique and put them into an essay.








[s1]I. Introduction

A. Topic and opinion

B. Reason why you chose this topic (Note: This must be different than your opinion.)

[s2]II. First claim

A. Statement

B. Researched support for the statement

C. Objections and refutation, which has been researched

[s3]III. Second claim

A. Statement

B. Researched support for the statement

C. Objections and refutation, which has been researched

[s4]IV. Third claim

A. Statement

B. Researched support for the statement

C. Objections and refutation, which has been researched

[s5]V. Conclusion

A. Restatement of topic

B. Restatement of main ideas

Customer: replied 4 years ago.


Expert:  galentm replied 4 years ago.

I received it, yes. As it stands now, I'm very unclear as to what the paper is answering, i.e., what the thesis or main argument of your paper is. This should be clear, and placed at the beginning, in the first or second sentence.


I feel unable to assist much at this point in time, as my background expertise is in English composition, and the paper requires much more substance before I can attempt to edit its form.

However, as a rough suggestion, the following might be a good jumping off point.


Holding parents legally culpable for their failures as parents in exposing children to expected social norms is both just and within the purpose of furthering public welfare. However, the liabilities must end somewhere, as measuring success or failure is utterly subjective and, taken too far, this rule could lead to severe persecution of minority beliefs or cultures as manifested in parenting.


Before schooling, and ultimately employment, children develop almost exclusively within the purview of their parents. Because modern society places such demand on adherence to certain common rules and norms, having an early childhood grasp of these norms is deemed important, if not essential; the alternative can mean perpetual inappropriate or criminal behavior which is a burden on both society and the child. Thus, this role of exposing children to expected norms of society falls to the parents, and because of its importance, it seems proper to provide deterrents for the failure of providing this exposure. Though there are non-legal deterrents, such as public shame and disrespect for "bad" parenting, there are legal reprocussions as well: parents are generally culpable, to a reasonable degree, for their failures as parents in this respect. This is both just and necessary to the continued general health and public welfare, for three main reasons: A, B, C.

Customer: replied 4 years ago.







Expert:  galentm replied 4 years ago.

I'm very sorry, I was under the impression that this was a paper that required corrections. As it stands now it looks like an outline that requires the paper to be written. I will open the question up to other experts by opting out.

I am sorry I could not be of more assistance

Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Expert:  Angela--Mod replied 4 years ago.

Hi, I’m a moderator for this topic and I wonder whether you’re still waiting for an answer. If you are, please let me know and I will do my best to find another Expert to assist you right away. If not, feel free to let me know and I will cancel this question for you. Thank you!

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

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