My daughter (age 40) has her first wedding planned for June. She and her fiancé (age 60) have a home together and have dated for several years. Since this is her first wedding, I offered to pay for a wedding with a maximum of 150 guests. After much discussion, she and her fiancé were firm with over 250 guests, stating that they were sure everyone invited would not attend. Although the guest list increased, no offer of financial assistance was given from my daughter or fiancé (an attorney). During this time of engagement, I was laid off from my management position and now have been unemployed for over 6 months. My daughter is continuing to send invoices for wedding expenses. Needless to say, without a job, my wife and i need our remaining money to survive. It seems that I am expected to foot the bill for this gigantic wedding, even though my life has changed dramatically since the engagement. I feel awful about this and don't know what to do. Any advice?Sad Dad
Dear Sad Dad,I absolutely understand Your situation, however the first person who should understand it, Your daughter should be... The first reason she should stop sending You the bills is the number of guests You "undertook", which was only 150 ppl. Another reason is Your situation at job.I think, honesty is the shortest, easiest and clearest way to follow. Dare to talk her about Your bad feelings, but dare to talk about Your hard situation. She must understand it. You helped her, when You were able to do it, but now the situation has changed. If she doesn't understand it, something is wrong with her...
I'm a wedding planner since 2007 and I happily answer to Your questions.