Bride's Family Paying for Wedding.I am very much paleo-conservative and traditional. I adhere to the belief that it is the duty and obligation of the father/family of the bride to pay for a wedding. That is, part of having a daughter is knowing that someday you'll have to pay for her wedding ..someday I will be paying it forward as well..My soon-to-be wife accepts this philosophy.Her family approves of the marriage, is conservative and religious, so them being sympathetic to the view is not that far out of bounds. However, her family/father does not want to contribute a penny to the cost of a wedding.He's divorced and has 6 daughters and a son.Historically or traditionally, how did poor, impoverished, and broke families arrange to pay for a wedding? We don't want anything extravagant. I just expect them to acknowledge their duty to pay for their daughters wedding and set a budget in accordance with what is suitable... not be delinquent in the duties of raising a daughter.Selling out our principles isn't really an option. So how do we cut a deal with her father/family to pay for a wedding of a marriage they are supportive of?
Dear JA Customer,however nowadays there are no strict rules about "who pays for what" in the weddings, I really appreciate Your thinking about the traditions. But, on the other hand You cannot force the father of Your bride to pay for the wedding, if he don't want or simply has no money for this. Of course, I also think, he should contribute to the wedding budget. I think, it is the bride's task to clear it with her father and set a compromise. Here are some items, which used to be paid by the bride's family: bridal bouquet, grandmother corsage, ceremony/reception flowers, altar decoration, carpet, kneeling bench, invitations, special wedding programs (if any), church fee, musicians, janitor, reception hall rental fee (if any), food and drinks, photographer, videographer, cake, favors. So, the father of Your bride must see that he has a lot of obligations as per the traditions... But if he doesn't, I hardly can imagine You can do anything.Another option to wait a bit, collecting money and pay for the wedding yourself.And, as I wrote earlier, I think, You should concede this "dispute" to Your bride, since if You will seem to force this sensitive issue, it easily can result in stress between You and Your bride, You and Your bride's father or between Your bride and her father. None of them is desired, I think.This is my personal opinion, I hope, it helps.
I'm a wedding planner since 2007 and I happily answer to Your questions.