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Does she have diabetes? Has she ever been tested for diabetes?
I'm not sure what is causing the swelling in the hands and feet. But she needs to see her primary doctor to do blood work to see what the cause is. The tingling could possibly be related to diabetes causing nerve damage. Diabetes can also cause bladder damage that can prevent a person from being able to urinate. She needs to get into see a urologist to do a test called urodynamics to see if there is damage to the bladder. This will help to determine what needs to be done to help her drain the bladder. Hope this helps.