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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: UK Law
Satisfied Customers: 69361
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice.
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Husband charged with domestic assault. How to reconcile?

Customer Question

Yesterday after my husband hit me I called police and they arrested him and my mother in law they took them in custody overnight and today I got call saying they have been charged and court will decide. Now I don't want to proceed the charge and want to reconcile with my husband as I am pregnant.
Submitted: 11 months ago.
Category: UK Law
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

Have you done this before?

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
No. But I do not want to go to court or do anything against them. Court hearing is in 2 weeks. I just want to withdraw my statement please.
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

It isn't that simple I'm afraid.

Just to be clear, you have never called the police to a domestic squabble before at all ever?

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
No I haven't called police before. I just want to withdraw and sont want to continue. I want reconcilation with my husband.
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

What did you allege on this occasion?

there is no prospect of them letting you withdraw. They have taken a statement already and public money has been wasted on this. They will almost certainly summons.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
I told them that he hit me and try to control me and his mum once tried to scratch my arm.
What are summons? Is it just a fine? I can pay fine its ok
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

No, it is not just a fine.

What do you mean he tried to control you?

What was the assault that you alleged?

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
They don't let me see my family and control what I wear and where I go, I am pregnant and cant deal with this. I want to get back with my husband please. What shall i do now?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

They will summons you. There is no way around it.

You can retract but they will just use it to get a summons.

The fact that you are pregnant is an aggravating feature and also will be flagged up as increasing vulnerability.

The court will probably bail him with conditions not to have contact with you. You can ask for those to be varied but it will be refused.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
How do i retract it please?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

Just tell the police you don't want to support the prosecution but it is a waste of time. I wouldn't waste your time on a retraction.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
I want to get back with him. I cant leave him
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

They will only use it to get a summons.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
What is summons?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

Whether you answer the summons or not is another matter but they could seek a warrant for your arrest. They do not commonly but they could. A summons to come to court and give evidence. Failing to do so is a contempt punishable by up to three months custody.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
How do i end this matter. Can I tell police that I dont want to go to court?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

There are no magic wands I'm afraid. The allegation has been made, a large amount of taxpayer's money and police time has been wasted and they will pursue it.

The only way to avoid this is not to make reports to the police. You can tell the police you don't want to support the prosecution but it is a waste of time. I wouldn't waste your time on a retraction.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
What is the legal way to end it now? Can i say i was under pressure and stress when i gave statement?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

No, because that is untrue. And anyway is a non issue.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
What is the legal way to end this?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

Just tell the police you don't want to support the prosecution but it is a waste of time. I wouldn't waste your time on a retraction.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Will it end the matter?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

No. They will use it get a summons.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Then? Anyway i can end it in court? Can i ask for reconcilation in court?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

No, they will prosecute this.

You can refuse to give evidence but then you face the risks I mentioned above.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Whats the way out please. There should be some legal way
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

I am really sorry but I am not going to be able to give you any other answer. There are no magic wands. If you had posted earlier I would have told you not to report it to the police but you did and we can't go back.

Customer: replied 11 months ago.
Then what will happen now at court?
Expert:  Jo C. replied 11 months ago.

He will either plead guilty or not guilty.

If he hasn't admitted it then he should really plead not guilty. It depends whether he is charged with assault or coercive control. If it is the latter he should take crown court trial as they will never convict.

But they will bail him with conditions not to contact you until the trial is over which will be many months away I'm afraid.
No problem and all the best. For the future, you can avoid this by just not making reports to the police. That is not to say that you have to put up with bad behaviour but you can sort out personal disputes yourself and still have control over them.

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