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I am the grandmother of two small children 6 and 3. My son is going through a very bitter divorce and seems to be coming out the other side with regard to his children. Unfortunately my daughter in law really has it in for me. She has stopped me seeing my grandchildren because she views me as a "threat" to them. I have never been anything but a loving grandmother and now find myself in a very difficult position. My son is living in my home, I spend most of my time in Switzerland where my husband is working and return home every 3/4 months and stay in UK to be with my two sons and my elderly mother (86). My daughter in law states that I can only see my g/children for 1 hour (my sons has them from 9 to 6 on a Sunday) on a Sunday and then I must leave the premises. She has also offered staying contact every other weekend. I am not prepared to leave my home. No one has asked me anything about the allegation and if I had committed a murder I would be assume innocent until proven guilty and at least allowed to say my piece. We have jumped through hoops for this woman and I am not prepared to leave my home. What right does she have to rule my life. She has never said to me to my face that she doesn't trust me with her children. Any advice. This has been going on for 2 years through the legal process (without the help of legal aid) and cost us untold heartache and misery. What do you suggest I do?
Optional Information: System of Law: England-and-Wales Already Tried: This is it
hi
thanks for your question
if the case is still going on in court and she is making allegations against you you can apply to be in intervener in the case to answer the allegations that are being made
alternatively you could seek leave (permission) from the court to make an application in your own right for contact
at this time, your daughter in law can i'm afraid make the kind of demands you have described. The court process is there to monitor the progress being made and ensure that her position doesn't become too unreasobable or detrimental to the children
as she hasn't made the allegation directly to you and you haven't had the chance to counter them, being involved in the court process will make the biggest impact and that is best achieved by making the application noted above, to interevene in the case
without that, it's unlikely that you'll be able to get to the bottom of her position and make her change it. The risk is that if your son simply allows you to see the children for longer than is 'allowed' it could mean that his contact with the children is jepordised as mother may say (if she finds out) that she can't trust him and may then apply to court to reduce the time he has or where he is able to have contact
the court's priority is for the children to have a relationship and proper contact with their father so that will come above your time with them for the moment but i would still sugges there is merit in becoming involved if for no other reason that 'clearing yoru name'
I hope that helps, if you have any other questions before you are happy to accept, please let me know
Experience: LLB, post graduate diploma, 6 years practicing UK law.