How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: UK Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33283
Experience:  25 years experience of all aspects of family law
13262538
Type Your UK Family Law Question Here...
Clare is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I would like Clare (solicitor) to answer this please: This

Customer Question

I would like Clare (solicitor) to answer this please:
This is the proposed email please:Dear *****
Thank you for your correspondence. I have to say I was surprised by the letter and the prematurity of its content, as we are not entering divorce proceedings.
I understand that she is distressed ( being pregnant) and that my only wish is to make the marriage work. I am happy to provide financial support for her during the pregnancy but I feel that this is something to be discussed between ourselves, especially as it involves the baby and naturally would like to be involved in the stages of pregnancy.
I feel the demands for provision of child like things before a child is born at this stage is not reasonable and we would have to agree upon what is an affordable expense. However if Alliah is not willing to communicate with myself about financial support, and wishes to go down a formal route.Then unfortunately I would need to seek formal legal input and would be requiring full disclosure via bank statements regarding her assets, income and reasonable expenditure whilst she is being supported by her family in Glasgow.
I hope that she will realise it is in everyone's best interest for her to simply communicate with myself as the marriage is not yet absolved and would be better for the child if the parents worked together and provided a good environment for the child.
I shall await her response and pending that, will seek the most appropriate recourse.
Thanking you for your time and consideration in the matter.
Kindest regards
Monsanto
Submitted: 4 months ago.
Category: UK Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 4 months ago.

That is fine

There are a few typing errors (but frankly my own typing is bad) but essentially is is polite low key and conciliatory - while still making your position clear

Well done.

Personally I would start it with a more formal Dear Ms xxx but then again I am old!

Customer: replied 4 months ago.
I had a long think last night about things and some of what you echoed. I reflected over the letter sent and alarming became quite shocked so I drafted up another version which I would be grateful if you could look at please:Dear Ms AnnThank you for your correspondence.
I understand that she is distressed (being pregnant) and that my only wish is to make the marriage work.
As you can appreciate that recall of events in my emotional anxious state can be cloudy and your letter highlighted a grave concern for me. You stated in your letter that Alliah left in February 2016, something which I hadn't alluded to because of my emotional state. It made me go through our correspondences and alarmingly, I received a picture message dated the 28th February from Alliah's, stating that she is 2-3 weeks pregnant as confirmed via a test.As you can appreciate, if she had moved out , then I have an alarming concern about the parentage of the child. I do appreciate that whilst being emotionally clouded, I can't help but also feel that the preceding month before her move, we weren't intimate. Whilst I don't wish to harbour these thoughts and make accusations, they are unfortunately augmented by Alliah's 's recent contrived activities of false allegations to my family and whilst being separated, unauthorised use of my bank cards without explicit permission. In addition, her exclusion of me in the pregnancy and informing the midwife whilst we were in communication, that I would not be there for the delivery is also conducing towards this concern.Is it possible that maybe that I am not the father and for this reason, is excluding me from being part of it or telling me about the last scan result? These recent actions are echoing an unwanted overwhelming sense of evinced insincerity and I feel regretful to have these concerns now. In order to quell these unwanted thoughts, which have been planted, I feel an open dialogue with Alliah would be beneficial to eliminate my concerns. I want to be responsible for any children I have but unfortunately if I am unable to quell these concerns, then it maybe a paternity test will be required before any financial support can be legally ordained. If my doubts are quelled with a conversation with Alliah, I am happy to provide financial support for her during the pregnancy but I feel that this is something to be discussed between ourselves, especially as it involves the baby and naturally would like to be involved in the stages of pregnancy.
I am not averse to providing spousal maintenance and this should be within reason, necessity and affordability. Again I believe it is important for us to have an open conversation to come to a mutual agreement as she is aware of my financial difficulties and demands. However if Alliah is not willing to communicate with myself about financial support, and wishes to go down a formal route.Then unfortunately I would need to seek formal legal input and would be requiring full disclosure via bank statements and appropriate invoices regarding her assets, investments, tax returns,income and reasonable expenditure whilst she is being supported by her family in Glasgow. Your letter also unfortunately depicted her plans to move and continue to stay away, which was not my understanding of this trial separation. I was hoping to arrange an open conversation with her and her family to see if things can be resolved, for it is in the best interest for everyone. I have no intentions except to make things better, but if she feels she can only communicate with me through a formal route, then unfortunately, it pictures that regrettably our communication is truly broken and irretrievable with no intention to make things work.Therefore I feel if this is the route she wishes to pursue, then ultimately and regrettably, I would be faced with no choice but to file for divorce proceedings.
I hope that she will realise it is in everyone's best interest for her to simply communicate with myself as the marriage is not yet absolved and would be better to clear up misunderstandings and hopefully create a good environment for a family without the burdening experience of legal pursuits.
I shall await her response and pending that, will seek the most appropriate recourse.
Thanking you for your time and consideration in the matter.
Kindest regards
Expert:  Clare replied 4 months ago.

I prefer your first letter.

There is no point in raising the issue of parentage until the child is born and a DNA test can be done

Related UK Family Law Questions