UK Family Law
UK Family Law Questions Answered by Verified Experts
I am sorry that it was a difficult time.
The behaviour of your sister is bound to cause concern -especially in the light of your father's record.
However there is still the simple fact that there is no evidence to back up the allegations and this will become clear when the evidence is heard
Stay strong and keep going - her allegations are getting wilder and wilder and you are dealing with them well
Ok Claire. Very worrying that the Judge says that I am from a dysfunctional family. Ex asked Judge for the prohibited steps order to be lifted for a month so that she can go to Brazil for a holiday. I'm not sure what happens next regarding this. I sure I told you before that my ex has heart failure. Yesterday she did not look well and she is swollen in the stomach area and her face. No matter what she accuses me of, it's sad to see her like this and I think her body is retaining fluid just like it did in 2008, when she became very ill and was just 2 hours off the heart transplant list, if they couldn't get the water drained from her body in time. To be honest I think that my evil brother and sister becoming involved, has taken its tool on her, cos after all I am my daughters Daddy.
The format of this page has changed and I am not seeing the usual "Claire is working on your question".
The page seems to be working better now. I don't know why it was all different. I couldn't see my questions and your answer. Hopefully you get this ok.
Judge really did seem to be against me yesterday. The Court did not order disclosures about my Dad and brother, yet they are being used against me in Court. My other two brothers committed suicide. This paints a very bad picture of my family and me, because when I broke my foot I became really depressed after losing all my work and being off for almost a year. I heard voices at this time and needed mental health team to help me. I recovered fully but the opposition are using the "hearing voices" thing in a very big way and that's why my ex has stated that the "father can kill his daughter and then himself".
Hi Claire, I'm not sure. Months ago the Court gave me "liberty" to provide a mental health report. My GP done a letter which was good and stated that I only suffered anxiety, which was understandable due to the pressure of representing myself as I am a plumber and not a Solicitor. My Mental Health nurse told me yesterday that I am NOT mentally ill.
I have not asked for a report on ex's physical health. There are no more hearings in Court before the FOF, which is 7th, 8th, and 9th of August. Does this need to been done through the Court or can my Solicitor ask for it?
No I finished yesterday?
What should I do about ex's physical health?
Ok Claire. I really feel down because Judge said I come from a dysfunctional family!
I can't believe that family Court is such an horrendous experience with just about everything being thrown at me.
The Judge ruled all allegations to be used in favour of the Mother. (18 of them) I have made none about her.
My child proceedings started last year with many hearings and then on the day of the FOF.....I have been accused of abusing my daughter!!
I don't know what our legal system has come to and why the Judge did not ask......why was this NOT mentioned at the start!!
I remember you saying a long time ago that my sister would not be able to "hijack" my case. But that is exactly what has happened and the Judge is very clearly using my Father and Brother's Police interviews against me., because he said they would be used at the FOF.
I spoke to my neighbour earlier Claire about my case. He said he has a colleague at work in much the same situation as my case and then at a very late stage....up popped a serious allegation regarding his daughter. Just like what happened to me.
The Judge ordered the Mother to get the Police to be involved. He said it is now a criminal investigation.
My neighbour said that he believes that the Judge overstepped his power at family Court and that I should be very concerned, because it is the very same Court that I am attending!!
Trying my best Claire, but I just find this whole process very very upsetting.
The only conviction I have in my life is drunk driving many years ago. No cautions, no arrests. Not one phone call to the Police during my marriage.
My Barrister told me on Tuesday that the most I can get is supervised contact.
Does that sound fair to you?
Hi Claire. My sisters friend whom she is obsessed with, caused all of this to happen. She is the child protection Police Officer that came over here with her from N Ireland for the FOF in April. I'm sure she spoke to my ex and told her exactly what to say and how to say it.
If Police over there think that I abused a child over here, then I am sure they will take that to CPS, regarding my sister from some forty years ago.
My whole case here revolves around them over there, I'm sure of it, and they are doing this so they can "get me" !!!!!
hi Claire, the Judge seemed really concerned about the disclosures. He said I was from a dysfunctional family and that this was a worrying case, therefore I am allowing all allegations (18)in favour of the Mother. I know that the FOF is not going to go my way. I could see it in the Judge's face. He said that my Father admitted to touching my sister and makes no difference if he was charged or not. Believe me, he is very far from happy. The way that the disclosures are presented is very clever and most damaging to me. That's why they were 6 weeks late and some clever person done them this way. Can I appeal immediately and keep the prohibited steps order in place? Regards Sean
Hi Claire, I sent the Police disclosures to a very prominent criminal Solicitor that I know in N Ireland. He sent me an email yesterday. He finds the Police disclosures to be nothing short of totally "deplorable" and "totally beyond belief", that they were sent to the Director of Public Prosecutions in 1994.
He says I should confront the Chief Constable of N Ireland to explain why this has happened and why two of his Police Officers clearly made statements that I had a Solicitor present in 1994....that does not and never has....existed!!
I have to attend a FOF hearing in August when in "fact" these disclosures are falsified.
Ok. I'm having a bad day today. My daughters weekly newsletter came today. She's having her First Holy Communion on 22nd and is nothing short of a tragedy that she cannot see her Daddy on this special day for her. Dear God....how did all this happen!!!
Hi Claire, A few weeks ago the FOF was adjourned cause ex said that she believes that I "groomed" my daughter and will abuse her in the future. She was ordered to make a statement. The statement came and says "perhaps sexually". In the Scott Schedule it clearly says I touched my daughter, yet in her statement it does not say this. My Barrister said that she could not cross examine a Scott Schedule and asked for a new statement. New statement came and it's horrendous!! She says I touched my daughters genitals once a week on the couch for two years, when ex was sitting beside us and on one occasion when I got out of shower I slapped my 3 year old daughter on the head with my willy!!. She says that it only came to her mind when she was talking to people in the refuge!! (January). About 3 weeks after she left the refuge, she did statement number two. There is NO mention of anything regarding my daughter in this statement. This is getting worse and worse all the time. I was ordered to do new statement regarding all allegations in the Scott Schedule. I filed this answer statement at last hearing because ex's was 12 days late. That's means that my ex had all my "answers" to Scott Schedule regarding my daughter, before she made this new statement. There is no order for me to reply to this new statement. I did the reply first....and then ex did statement. This is beyond belief!! My very first statement was sent to my bad sister and then she made hers. My good sister made a statement and that was sent to my bad sister and then my bad sister done another statement about my good sister!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please forgive me Claire, but I don't know what is going on here!!!! All this seems so wrong.....and I have a Judge telling me that I'm the one that comes from a dysfunctional family!!
Spoke to my neighbour who is very intelligent (the one that said about Police becoming involved). Ex took out Non molestation against me when she left the refuge, banning me from coming near her. I was representing myself at the time. I did not contest it and told the Judge that I had no intention of ever going near her. My neighbour said that because I did not contest it that all the allegations in her statement are seen as fact and that by me not contesting it.....is an admission of guilt!! Is this true?
To be honest Claire, I don't know how much more I can take. I am ready to pull out, just like the 85% of Dads in the UK who get destroyed by the Family Court system.
The Judge made it clear that my Dad admitted touching my sister. I could tell that the Judge is putting a lot of weight on this and that my sister appearing as a witness cause he asked the other side if she was appearing at FOF, and they said yes.
My Barrister did say afterwards that my sister is in a much stronger position because of this.
Ok Claire, is dancing naked in and out of the shower a form of abuse or grooming? To me it was just innocent fun and my willy moving when I danced was only normal. Ex's wording of this is very cleverly done and she is now saying that she always told me to stop this. This is not true and like me she saw it as harmless fun at the time. Her Barrister mentioned this "willy dance" quite a lot and said it was not normal. She said that I groomed my sister when she was 6/7 years old. I was 11/12 years old then and only a child myself and would not have a clue what grooming was. Any mention of "grooming" on the web that I have seen, always is by an adult.
Ok Claire, just one more question and I do your rating.
I had two girlfriends just before I met my ex. Each of these ladies had two daughters 2 and 4 years, and 12 and 14 years. There was never ever any form of abuse or violence towards these ladies or their daughters. I was still drinking back then also.
Ex stopped the FOF because of new allegations regarding my daughter. There was never any mention of anything bad towards my daughter until then.
Should I ask my solicitor if I could get statements from these two ladies, or am I too late? I didn't think I needed any statements regarding previous children, until this happened.
Thank you and we speak soon.