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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: UK Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33281
Experience:  25 years experience of all aspects of family law
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I am the husband (new) of Paula who has 3 children who all live with us at my home. We sup

Customer Question

I am the husband (new) of Paula who has 3 children who all live with us at my home. We support them with no financial help from her ex who DOES work albeit self employed. He has paid nothing in 5 yrs. We are currently talking to the CSA about this. He has now reported us to social services accusing us of neglecting the children. He has a track record of accusing people falsely and has in text form implied that I have acted improperly towards his children...(he did not elaborate) Do we have any legal standing to bring an end to what is becoming harassment. He refuses to talk to either of us and gets his new wife to text or he tries to communicate and discuss ALL issues with his 12 yr old daughter. Please help or advise in any way
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: UK Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Thank you for your question.
I will do my best to assist you but need some further information first.
How old are the children and what contact does he have with them?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
The children are 10yr old boy, 12 and 14 yr old girls. He sees them irregularly as he often refuses to meet us half way. He is in Peterborough and we are in Surrey. The boy sometimes says he doesn't want to go. He has a habit of interrogating the chdren when he sees them and constantly moaning about their mother and the fact we have apied for maintenance.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
HI
Is there a contact order in place - if not how is contact arranged?
Claire
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
No contact order in place it is all done informally. Normally he gets the 12yr old to relay messages or gets his Philippine wife to text. He will not speak to me and only seems to call Paula when he wants to rant about something. The latest development is he has made a complaint to social services accusing Paula of not looking after the children. The 12yr old is type one diabetic. She ended up in hospital in his care and the diabetic nurse advised us not to let her stay with him anymore but we have thought to give him the benefit of the doubt. All of this unpleasantness seems to have started since we approached the CSA.Tony
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Hi
Using a child to pass messages and arrange contact is simply not acceptable.
Nor is his refusal to discuss matters with your partner given the illness of the child
Your partner can consider making it clear that unless her ex arranges contact with her - using Family mediation if necessary (www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk) then there will be no contact at all.
He cannot be stopped from making complaints to Social Services - but you ex can take control of what happens with regard to contact in the future.
If he applies to the court then he will discover that the court will expect a regular pattern and proper communication
If you need further clarification or information please let me know
Claire

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