I'm not altogether certain what you mean by is a divorce granted automatically.

You do have to petition for divorce, it doesn't just happen. I think what you mean is that after five years separation, if you apply for a divorce, can he contest it or can the judge finds some other reason not to divorce you. In law, few things happen automatically and this is one of them. The judge may want a hearing and you will be required to give details of the circumstances. The judge must be satisfied that you have lived apart for five years or more.

You will be well advised to sort the finances before getting divorced and also get contact and residence formalised into one order.

With regard to sorting out the nitty-gritty, do try mediation

http://www.familymediationhelpline.co.uk/find-service.php

because it is quicker and cheaper and less confrontational than court.

Child maintenance is dealt with the CSA in any event.

The usual situation is that the respondent pays divorce costs unless you agree otherwise. The situation with ancillary matters (money, assets, house, children) is that each party pays their own costs unless there is some reason why one should pay. If he has been particularly awkward, you can ask for costs and it is then the courts decision.

Can I help further?

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