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I want to protect my children (12 and 20) from their father

 
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  • Answered by:claire
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Customer Question

I want to protect my children (12 and 20) from their father who is mentalyl unwell and is saying highly inappropriate comments to them, can I get a restraining orer?

 

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State/Country relating to question: United Kingdom

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Submitted: 307 days and 14 hours ago.
Category: UK Family Law
Value: £22
Status: CLOSED
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Expert:  Law Denning replied 307 days and 13 hours ago.

-Could you explain your situation a little more?

Customer replied 307 days and 13 hours ago.

Did you get my response...

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Expert:  claire replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

Hi
What contact does the 12 year old have with his father?
Claire

Customer replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

2 nights per week and all day Sunday....

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Expert:  claire replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

Hi
What is his father saying that is causing the problem?
Claire

Customer replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

Have you seen the email I sent about his condition.. Bi-polar, not sure it got through?

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Expert:  claire replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

Hi
No it did not.
Given that he is bi-polar why does he have overnight contact with the child?
Claire

Customer replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

My ex was treated and spent 1 month in The Priory and considered to be stable. He was retired through the condition from the police force having served for 25 years. He has been arrested and convicted twice for assault, firstly on a girlfriends minor and then another girlfriend that he assaulted. I called the police on another occassion when he threw a plate at our daughter in a public house, but his police colleagues and landlord protected him... so as you can see we have had lots of problems with him. His addiction is sex and says explicit things to my children and due to his condition at the moment he is, in my opinion, out of control. I met with him to try and agree rules and boundaries and his response was aggressive and frankly crazy. He is very intimidating so I want a restraining order until he has been stabilised. I have spoken to his brother and he agree's with me that the children should be kept away...

Customer replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

,

My ex was treated and spent 1 month in The Priory and considered to be stable. He was retired through the condition from the police force having served for 25 years. He has been arrested and convicted twice for assault, firstly on a girlfriends minor and then another girlfriend that he assaulted. I called the police on another occassion when he threw a plate at our daughter in a public house, but his police colleagues and landlord protected him... so as you can see we have had lots of problems with him. His addiction is sex and says explicit things to my children and due to his condition at the moment he is, in my opinion, out of control. I met with him to try and agree rules and boundaries and his response was aggressive and frankly crazy. He is very intimidating so I want a restraining order until he has been stabilised. I have spoken to his brother and he agree's with me that the children should be kept away...

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Expert:  claire replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

Hi
Is there a court order for contact?
Does your son wish to see his father ?
Claire

Customer replied 307 days and 12 hours ago.

no court order... and yes he does want to see his father.

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Expert:  claire replied 307 days and 11 hours ago.

Hi
If there is no court order for contact why are you allowing it?
Why do you think you need a Restraining Order at this time?
Claire

Customer replied 307 days and 11 hours ago.

he refuses to believe there is a problem and says he will continue to see our son without my permission.

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Expert:  claire replied 307 days and 11 hours ago.

Hi
There is nothing that you can do so far as the elder child is concerned - he is an adult and it is up to him what contact he has with his father.
You can apply to the court for a defined contact order with regard to your 12 year old and ask the court for a Psychiatric report to decide if it is safe for him to have contact with his father
This is more appropriate than an application for a non molestation order
Claire

Customer replied 307 days and 11 hours ago.

How do I organise a 'defined contact order'......

Accepted Answer

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Expert:  claire replied 307 days and 11 hours ago.

Hi
I would suggest that before you consider an application to seek face to face advice from a Family Law Specialist who can review your paperwork and check that you have a reasonable chance of success.
At 12 your son's wishes on contact will be seen a being of great importance and it will be expensive to obtain a psychiatric report to try and stop contact on the basis of safety.
If you do decide to go ahead you will need to make an application to your local county Court on a Form C100 available here http://www.thecustodyminefield.com/CourtForms/C100.pdf paying the fee of £200
Claire

Expert TypeFamily Solicitor
Category: UK Family Law
Pos. Feedback: 97.7 %
Accepts: 12260
Answered: 7/2/2012

Experience: 25 years experience of all aspects of family law

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