Welcome to Just Answer. I am here to help you resolve your tax and finance concerns. Please feel free to ask anytime you need extra help.
Tax wise it makes more sense to live in the state in which you earn your income. If you live in one state and work in another you end up paying taxes to both although there are tax credits to help reduce (but not totally eliminate) the double tax effect. As to PA taxing you to death, the only way to compare taxes between states is to take a look at the complete tax package. Real estate taxes, school taxes, sales taxes, personal property taxes, and income taxes need to be of the evaluation. If you will be working in PA logic says it is less costly to live there as well.