Hi. It seems like the fit around intimacy is off and as you say you will need to make peace with it or leave the relationship if you cannot feel satisfied. I don't imagine this is a new phenomenon so what drew you to her in the first place and how did yu mange at the start of the marriage.
I will be a bit forthright here and mention that the things you suggest and maybe how you suggest it feel harsh and also demeaning and not driven by media, but rather your desire for her to behave, dress and act in a way that you desire. I think more acceptance needs to be attained and not just around the kind of sex but rather for whom and how she is. Clearly your desire and need for intimacy are different and I do believe in you putting out those needs and hoping she can meet you halfway and for more than 2 weeks, but the add on pressure of articles, maintaining her body how you desire may be off putting and may even keep her distant from you. So while it may not be as heated as you desire, she is intimate with you just maybe not in the complete way you desire. So I do think speaking to her with empathy and love can be helpful and I do also believe the pressure that has been put on her in and out of the bedroom can be lessened with more acceptance which could deepen the connection.
I am here to talk further if you need.
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