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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2820
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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I have two beautiful children and I am happy!!!! My wife wants

Customer Question

I have two beautiful children and I am happy!!!! My wife wants a third child I do not believe we can afford or have the time and patient for that and think it is the wrong decision for me and the family. I have told her all my concerns and she refuses to understand what do I do.
Submitted: 7 months ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 7 months ago.
I am sorry this is happening and it is not uncommon when the desires around children take a different direction. There is no magic answer here other than to carve out time for you to both have the chance to speak about the feelings and desires. She needs to be able to express why she desires another one and you need to listen. You need to be able to express how you are happy with how things are and she needs to listen too. The house being a mess probably isn't reason enough for her, so I would really let her know that you love your family as it is and believe it is the right thing to keep it the way it is now. You both must be able to speak of the feelings and you both must be able to listen.
Customer: replied 7 months ago.
It not just the messy house I don't think i can handle another kid my kids r both girls and they r 4 and 2 years old they r a lot of work she's in school and works full time I work full time and run my own business on nights and weekends and we want the best for the kid we have my oldest Eden will be going to private school next year and that not cheap I don't think we can afford the life style we what with three and I can get that through to her that the dream we've talked about May and most likely won't come to pass. Also I can't handle it two is plenty a third whould push my patience. I think I would have a mental breake down. Talking and listening has been tried.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 7 months ago.
And you articulate your feelings well to me here. I would continue to do so with her. Is she willing to lose this relationship over it?
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 7 months ago.
If all good for now, please take a moment to click on the rating tab to rate my support so that I may be credited for my time. Thanks in advance. Jen