If it is love that you are seeking, you are going about things entirely the wrong way. What many fail to realize is beauty exudes from the inside out. Therefore, physically you may be able to attract a mate, but if you are not happy, satisfied, and understand your worth you will not be able to sustain a relationship. As a forensic psychologist specializing in familial dysfunctions and a relationship expert you appear to be getting in the way of yourself. You are engaging in things that can only lead to disaster. The older gentleman you went on a date with was clearly not ready for a new relationship as he was not over his divorce. Posting provocative pictures on a sex chat site, suggests you are looking for and or interested in intimate encounters, not something long term and committed. When we do not feel entirely comfortable and confident in ourselves it shows. People on the outside can typically pick up on the fact there is "something missing" and or lacking with someone else. Having confidence and not putting so much stress on oneself to "find the one", allows you to be open to the possibility of meeting and connecting with the right person. Often when we are desperate for the love of someone else, anyone else it shows. People are draw to and attracted to the confidence of a potential mate. The only advice I can give you is to ask yourself why am I sabotaging myself socially and romantically? Ask yourself why am I posing provocatively on dating sites and entering sex chat sites whose main purpose is to connect people that really want to have intimate encounters with no strings attached? I think you should take someone time getting to really know yourself, figure out hat it is you want and what qualities you are looking for in a mate. Once you are satisfied with yourself and comfortable in your own skin you would be surprised by the number of people that will be drawn to you, not just because of your physical beauty but you internal beauty as well.