Have Relationship Questions? Ask a Counselor for Answers ASAP
I am glad you are getting into therapy and exploring all ways to feel better. I don't think it is a matter of convincing her of anything...I think focusing on yourself and feeling better is the only way to go right now and in doing so, she will see on her own that you are doing well and in that time, it is possible for reconnection to happen. I think if oyu push her or get her to try to see things, it won't work. Let it be natural and as you feel better you will have more zest and can be the many YOU want to be. Let things settle and play out, work on yourself and slowly a renewed connection can take place.
I agree with TherapistJen. It sounds to me that you should definitely let the dust settle, focus on adjusting more, foci on developing your own insight, and also learning more about relationships and communication. Actions speak more loudly than words. The last thing you want to do is push this woman further away and create a message in yourself that continues to contribute to depression. Work on thought patterns and increase your confidence. Also keep in check the possibility of co-dependence. Make sure you're doing this for you and not just to impress anyone else. Sounds like you are a caring and empathetic person, but don't base your own worth on simply an opinion of someone else.
How are you spending your time while she is out? Focusing on what she is doing? Are you engaging in healthy outlets?
And have you thought about boundaries where you guys can have your own places?
This break up is hard for you and that is completely normal....made more difficult by the fact that you live together so each time you see her or know she is out with another, the wound remains fresh. What are the plans to remain in this living situation? I know you desire to keep things as they are in the hope that she changes her mind, but that doesn't help you to focus on your treatment and getting back to living a peaceful and content life. I can see how all of this compounds your sadness, but as I mentioned in my first response to you that your health and well being are what is crucial right now. I know part of you believes that if she was with you that all would be well, but we know from what you have been dealing with, that hasn't been true. As best you can keep the focus on your health and well being and find some things that you enjoy doing...maybe even look at some new things, things you have never tried before...this also puts you in a position to be around new people and see fresh faces who might share similar passions.
Let me know how else I can support you.
I am glad there are boundaries set, but you still see her often enough to feel hope and desire for things to be different. Right now she desires to be apart and the best thing that can be done is for you to focus on yourself and live your life. Ifor it is meant to be, then it will. Focus on you now as you are important and deserve to feel happiness and contentment.