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Anthony Bray, MD
Anthony Bray, MD, Doctor
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 10337
Experience:  14 years as clinician in the field of Family Practice
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I've been dating this guy months. He works I work 2nd shift.

Customer Question

I've been dating this guy for 2 months. He works for shift I work 2nd shift. We only spend maybe 15 minutes a day together and three or four hours on my day off together. Because we don't get a lot of time together I would like to sleep over. We are neighbors I'm going to work from my house is not an inconvenience for him. Yet he makes excuse after excuse to not spend the ni.ght. he is also in a rush all of the time. His excuse is that he needs a good night's sleep, can't sleep in bed with someone else , I feel like he is using me because I have lent him $300 total because he had two weeks without work I also am a very sweet person I I cooked meals and will make sure I leave him a plate. If he needs cigarettes or to do his laundry he don't mind asking for 5 or $10. He always texts very sweet things about how into me he is. But actions speak louder than words and its not matching up. I'm feeling hurt and used. Please give me some advice I really like him but I think we should put him out of my life. When I told you what you honestly think thank you for your advice. He also will do me favours while I'm at work but minute I come home he tired . I feel like he just doing things for me to make himself feel better like he dont spend time with me but will do a million errands for me as long I'm at work.
Submitted: 10 months ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Anthony Bray, MD replied 10 months ago.

Hello!

It seems that you are getting some mixed signals...one one hand he texts nice messages and expresses affection( we'll look at these as more probable positive signs...) Also you indicate that he does favors for you --- here again a positive ...

He is tired a lot you say ... Hmmm ...well I don't know if he may be busy off work or how bad that "tired" aspect is...so maybe legit but questionable....

I think him avoiding you and he spending night sounds kind of fishy...I would have concern that maybe he is involved with another and perhaps wants his cake and eat it too....I have to wonder if his time constraints MIGHT be a clue that he has to get to someone else....

The money thing may be a bit suspicious but I am not reading heavily into that ... Still a bit of potential red flag I agree....I would have interest that he is willing to spend money on you.... He has no problem asking 5 or 10 bucks but is the reverse true when he can afford??

I think keep watch and take your time. Your decision over this young dating relationship does not have to be decided this minute but I would keep alert to possible signs that he has another in his life and may be splitting his time between you and she ...

If you get signs of another woman now in his life then break it off clean and run for cover!!!

Perhaps not the case but keep your radar up....

I think that you should be able to get more solid look at this relationship within next couple of weeks ...

I hope that this is helpful for you

Let me know if you have further questions or concerns

I will be happy to get back with you

If my answers have been helpful and to your satisfaction then please remember to leave positive feedback Thank you and Best Regards,

Anthony Bray MD