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Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 5313
Experience:  Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology helping with relationships
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I do have a question about midlife crisis

Customer Question

Hi! I do have a question about midlife crisis
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Mark replied 1 year ago.

Hi! I'll be glad to help you with this issue.

I can imagine how frustrating this situation must be for you. You are clearly a loving and caring wife and this is an awful turn of events. That he is having an MLC is possible; that he is depressed we may be able to say with more certitude. However, here is the real problem:

His getting help and becoming more stable is not in your hands. I wish it were. But it is not.

And this is actually the key to my answer to you that you need to consider and think about. I know how hurtful these situations can be because I've seen it in my private practice so often. And your daughter's hurt is also real and she's right to feel that way.

It's very loving of you to try to help her see his problems as problems and not be angry; however, I'm concerned about you. What do I mean?

You are caught in a situation you cannot control. He may not come back. You must start thinking about yourself and your needs. I don't know if that means getting counseling for yourself to help you sort things out yet. But you need to think about what you want to do. Starting with:

How long before you decide that he is going to stay in his new life and new apartment. So, begin thinking in this way for yourself and your daughter's sake and decide on a time frame. And if you need help to just cope, there is no shame in that, okay?

Okay, I wish you the very best!

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