Hi and welcome. I am a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.
I am sad to hear of all of the incredible and overwhelming struggles you and she have been dealing with.
I send prayers for your Son as well.
Sadly her desire to leave is not all that uncommon after so many horrific events.
It sometimes feels safer to leave then to stay in the pain. Even if when she leaves the pain will still be there and possibly greater.
The best that can be done now is to be open with her about your feelings and desire to be there and remain together but that you will respect her need to be on her own.
Have done that
would I suggest that you disappear? No, I would suggest you remain as present as possible and try and find who you are again and who you can be.
The pain is unbearable i know but there is still life her for you to live...I am going out on a limb here but I believe your son would want that for you.
It will not be easy and so i will not pretend that it is...I will just be direct and honest with you that finding you within all of this is crucial.
that won't be easy as she is giving me a rather hard time and constantly pointing out my faults, of which I have ptenty, as does she but doesn't seem to be aware of them sadly
easier for her at this time to place fault with you and as best you can understand that is how she is able to disengage. Please try and not absorb her words as the truth for you.
We all do the best we can do and we all have faults and areas that we can be stronger...so I want you to go easy on yourself.
No, will try to work it out for myself. Thanks for your help
Thanks for your help. I am hopeful we will get through this year and life will gradually improve, At present we are still living day to day, there are no magic bullets and we are now at least communicating. Hopefully you will never have to go through such an awful year, and others who have had simil;ar experiences have been able to share theirs with us which have been invaluable. No more communications required thank you