Hello, I am Rafael. Thanks for asking your question - I'm here to support you. (Information posted here is not private or confidential but public).
I am sorry to know about this frustrating situation.
Could you please tell me more about the time he changed his behaviors towards you? You said you were having a wonderful relationship but then he stated he did not feel really connected with you, right?
Besides of having reduces the frequency of his texting which other behaviors or issues have you noticed have been affecting your relationship?
Have you asked him directly why he has reduced his messages this much? If you did, what was his response?
Is this the only change you have noticed, or has he also presenting other behaviors that concern you?
I see, it does make sense what you say and I agree that pushing him would never help, and as long as he keeps in touch with you, expresses affection and keeps sharing with you this much, I think it is totally worthy to be patient and see how this relationship evolve.
Unless he happens to radically change his behaviors, it could be fine, while you would continue to promote further openness, trust, intimacy and support, for him to feel more comfortable and understood by you, hoping he would do the same in the relationship.
Let's hope that his statement around not feeling this deep connection with you changes for better, and that he allows his wounding from past relationships to heal. Depending on how healthy and fulfilling this relationship happens to be, he would allow himself to trust you even more and to attach and commit himself to it too.
I understand. Based on your words I support your plan of not pushing him and giving him. Since he continues to be affectionate and respectful towards you, and sharing this much, I do think it could be helpful to show how much you care about him and the relationship taking these initiatives. Contacting him would be consistent with your affection and expectations as long as you continue respecting his boundaries.
Thus unless he tells you not to contact him this often, I do not see any problem with it. One extreme would be pushing him, and the other to end communication while he stills shows affection, respect and shares with you the way he currently does.
You could ask him how often is it fine with him to keep communication via text messages, phone or through other means, for you to be clear about what he wants and expects from you, and try to share the same, for him to understand you better. Then everything else would be about time, for you to see if he works on deepening your relationship or not.
You're very welcome. Please feel free to contact me for any further questions and to follow up, since I am here willing to support you.
Thank you for your trust.
Thanks, XXXXX XXXXX