How JustAnswer Works:

  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.

Ask Alicia_MSW Your Own Question

Alicia_MSW, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 792
Experience:  Specializing in relationship/family counseling
Type Your Relationship Question Here...
Alicia_MSW is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I met a girl about a month-2 months ago. Weve been talking

This answer was rated:

I met a girl about a month-2 months ago. We've been talking since then. She and I both really like each other. She's a very great funny caring girl who has a very successful career. She wants to date me and vice versa. I am a pretty relaxed kind of guy. I enjoy drinking beer with my buddies and working on trucks. I have been trashed about 2-3 times in my life. She is very romantic and enjoys spending quality time just me and her. However she will go out to a bar with girlfriends and she will drink 13 shots by herself and just be more than than hammered. She describes herself as a "Wild one". Yet she is very successfully in her career with a lot of responsibility. She is perfect besides this wild n crazy go out and party side she has every now and then. I don't know how to react or what I am supposed to do with someone who is "wild". Should I date her because we care about each other so much and everything else is perfect? Or should I not? If so. What do I do with this wild side of hers that doesn't match me ? Thank you.
Hi there,

Thanks for your question - I'm happy to try to help you today.

It sounds like you both really care about each other a lot and that you have the potential to develop more than just a superficial relationship. I do get the impression from what you've said here that you feel like you could have a real connection with her if you both decided to pursue the relationship. But the "wild side" could be a potential problem for you both if she can't keep a handle on it. If you are thinking about the long term possibilities for your relationship, then do you think you could be with her if she didn't change this behavior? Is it something you think you might feel comfortable addressing with her? It sounds like, since you say that her job is stressful, that she's just looking for a way to let off steam and unwind, but 13 shots is quite a few, (to put it lightly) and it could be a sign of a real problem. It could also depend on whether this is something she does every weekend or just once in a while. Obviously the more frequently it occurs the more likely it is that it could develop into a serious problem. She might not want to admit that she may have a problem, so it could be a touchy subject to address. Or she just might not see it as a problem at all. But if you are looking for a serious relationship, you might want to talk to her about it at some point. Since you've only known her for two months and it doesn't sound like your relationship is very serious yet, you could wait and see how things develop. Perhaps once she is in a committed relationship with you, her behavior will change and she won't feel the need to go out and party so frequently. But I also think you wouldn't be asking this question if you weren't concerned about it, so it is something to seriously consider and talk about with her, when you feel ready. If everything else is perfect, and she is willing to moderate her behavior (she doesn't have to give up partying, but she has to be willing to meet you in the middle, wherever that might be for you -- only you can decide what you feel comfortable with), then I think you should just give it a try and see what happens. If it doesn't work out and she doesn't want to change, or, as you said, the wild side doesn't match you, then you can always end things on a friendly note -- it's not as if you'll both be stuck in the relationship if things don't work.

I hope that helps, and I wish you luck!
Please let me know if you need additional assistance.
Alicia_MSW, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 792
Experience: Specializing in relationship/family counseling
Alicia_MSW and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
< Previous | Next >
  • Wonderful service, prompt, efficient, and accurate. Couldn't have asked for more. I cannot thank you enough for your help. Mary C. Freshfield, Liverpool, UK
  • This expert is wonderful. They truly know what they are talking about, and they actually care about you. They really helped put my nerves at ease. Thank you so much!!!! Alex Los Angeles, CA
  • Thank you for all your help. It is nice to know that this service is here for people like myself, who need answers fast and are not sure who to consult. GP Hesperia, CA
  • I couldn't be more satisfied! This is the site I will always come to when I need a second opinion. Justin Kernersville, NC
  • Just let me say that this encounter has been entirely professional and most helpful. I liked that I could ask additional questions and get answered in a very short turn around. Esther Woodstock, NY
  • Thank you so much for taking your time and knowledge to support my concerns. Not only did you answer my questions, you even took it a step further with replying with more pertinent information I needed to know. Robin Elkton, Maryland
  • He answered my question promptly and gave me accurate, detailed information. If all of your experts are half as good, you have a great thing going here. Diane Dallas, TX

Meet The Experts:

  • Kate McCoy

    Kate McCoy


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
< Last | Next >
  • Kate McCoy's Avatar

    Kate McCoy


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist


    Satisfied Customers:

    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • Ms Chase's Avatar

    Ms Chase

    Life Coach

    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 yrs experience with Relationships, Sexuality, Friendship, and Family Issues
  • Alicia_MSW's Avatar



    Satisfied Customers:

    Specializing in relationship/family counseling
  • Dr. Norman Brown's Avatar

    Dr. Norman Brown

    Marriage Therapist

    Satisfied Customers:

    Family Therapist & teacher 35+ yrs; PhD research in couples
  • Dr. L's Avatar

    Dr. L


    Satisfied Customers:

    Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
  • Suzanne's Avatar


    Therapist, LCSW

    Satisfied Customers:

    Experienced in treating trauma, relationship issues, co-dependency

Related Relationship Questions