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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1356
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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kiss

Resolved Question:

Hello I am in my early 40's and found a lady in her mid 30's online We met a week later in person. We had a nice dialogue which lasted 2 hours. There was a nice comfort between us. As we parted, I attempted to kiss her on the lips. She didn't resist but the target was missed...lol Since she was a pilot and on vacation. We eventually met up again 2 1/2 weeks later. Spent the day together at a bland museum. She appreciated my gestures in being a gentleman with her as many men don't respect her in her profession. The day ended as I we parted sitting my car. I kissed her three times lasting a few seconds. She didn't resist etc. At the end, she stroked my knee and left. We exchanged emails that we both enjoyed the night. I subsequently asked her out a couple of days later. She didn't respond to my email thus I phoned her. She acknowledged I was a great guy but there was a "slight problem" - lol She was hoping the chemistry would have strengthened from the 1st to 2nd date but it didn't. Upon asking her why she kissed me, she answered that she hoped it would spark it. Anyhow, she works quite a bit and I left the thought open that she consider that the chemistry might still develop and that even though I might not be the instant brad pitt, hopefully my character, sincerity and humour would win her over eventually. She is attracted to my body type but maybe optimally not my face....lol - Ultimately I know this is a type of woman I felt a connection with on a few realms. I left the telephone dialogue to end in a positive manner for her to think about it a tad more. By the end of the day, I unfortunately feeling my pride being hit a bit sent her an email about letting it to be in her court to contact me again if she was interested as I wouldn't re-initiate contact. She also in our two outings made comments about historical men in her past that didn't show good character. I made the following statement "Its funny you chose the word character in what you find void in men. That goes for women as well" I tried to imply her character was a bit questionable too. Perhaps not the best line but emotions sometimes get the best of one. ------ I am know thinking do I close the chapter or try with her again when her work schedule eases up. I know she really didn't resist to being kissed so he doesn't find me completing appalling......lol

Submitted: 10 months ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 10 months ago.
Hello. I would let this go for now. You had already told her you would keep things in her court and let her contact you if she was interested. You didn't say if she had a reply to your comment about character, but she may have been turned off by that as well. I think that you both gave it a good shot and while you feel stronger than she does about how things went, she seems content with letting it go. If you find that you cannot stop thinking about her, maybe in a month or so, you can try to contact her again just to say hello and to "check in" with her to see how things are going, but I wouldn't push it.
Customer: replied 10 months ago.

Makes sense Dr Paige.


So the aspect of kissing as I have been out of the picture for awhile.


 


Is it not reasonable to infer, a woman or man who has no physical liking of a person wouldn't allow themselves to be kissed on the lips?


 


Also, was the character comment completely out of line? Cant one show a bit of pride either


 


 

Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 10 months ago.
I don't think so. I think that a polite gesture would be as equal as showing affection. People put different "values" on a kiss and it would have been awkward for her to turn you down.
I don't think the character comment was out of line if you meant it. Sometimes you just have to say what's on your mind!
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1356
Experience: Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
Dr. Paige and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 10 months ago.

Dr Paige


Thanks for your initial analysis.


I shall attempt to call her in a few weeks.


I am hoping she is matur enough to see that I bring a few nice features to the table even if I am not Brad Pitt.


That's what I was trying to aim at with the "character" plug


--


As far as the kissing aspect, I don't agree.
Women who don't find you attractive will let you kiss them only on the cheeks. If there is a bit of physical attraction, the lips are hit.


 


goodnight


 


 

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