Hello, I am Rafael. Thanks for asking your question - I'm here to support you. (Information posted here is not private or confidential but public).
I am very sorry to know about this painful and frustrating situation.
Could you please etll me for how long were you dating and for how long he has been into online dating and sex websites?
Thank you for joining the chat.
Could you tell me more about your situation answering previous questions for me to better understand it?
Based on your story I think your chances to get back together are very high, since under similar circumstances you did get back. But my concern is exactly that no matter how dysfunctional the relationship could get you end feeling guilty, begging him and continuing the same circle over again.
What you described about his behaviors shows what seems to be sex and love addiction, to porn and the internet. It is very alarming how this break up happened because you confronted his behavior around his "online girls" and addiction, but at the end you ended up feeling guilty and begging him to come back, like if you were the one who was insensitive, disloyal and abusive instead of him.
Sure, I think he will, and taking into account your behavior, he would feel more confident and empowered to perpetuate his patterns and would get even worse. Sadly it seems your priority is to be back with him regardless of how much neglect, abuse, betrayal and manipulation get present in your relationship.
I do think he will contact you, and is using this time just to fuel your feelings of guilt and desperation even more, for him to have more power and control over you.
If you want him back no matter what, keep doing the same thing, do not push him but please him, and he would be back for sure.
Yes, of course, as long as you keep doing what he wants you to do, he would not want to let you go.
Again if your goal is to do anything possible to have him back no matter what, just focus on pleasing him, not pushing him, giving him the unconditional freedom he wants and he would come back for sure.
How long did it take for him to contact you in past episodes when you broke up?
I think he would keep it this way in order to fuel your feelings of guilt, so to have more control over you, and would take a period of time similar like in past episodes, but there is no way to know for sure.
This time he already looked for you after a day you left to be with these friends.
Once he calms down and see that you are still feeling the way you feel and wanting him to come back no matter what, he would come back to you I think.
I think he will unless you go to him first and continue to ask him for another chance.
He has been fine with it for these past two years as long as you do not interfere with his life and other relationships.then I believe he would not let you go that easily. Choose the period of time you think would better work for him to know you want him back and are willing to please him
Since you have chosen too get him back regardless the consequences you already know, then do what you know would please him the most, and that would increase your chances to have him back sooner.
I would say that if after a week he has not contacted you, you would have to take the initiative and contact him and let him know how you feel and what you want and hope.
Yes I do think so, the worse you feel about it, the better for him, since he would feel empowered and more in control, and he would not let you go that easily knowing that he has got more power int he relationship.
Seems he fears you may have been with other men when you were not dating and wants confirmation that you would continue allowing him do have total freedom to do as he pleases, not interfering at all.
I think by you doing what I just said, namely not pushing him, respecting his boundaries, pleasing him and then showing him how much you want him back would be the best way for you to get him back. Pushing him to get back sooner than what he wants and plans would not help. Again , this is exclusively considering that your only goal is to have him back and not about how healthy or not it would be for you to do so.
I think so as long as he thinks you would be willing to play the same role like in the past, not interfering with his private life and pleasing him as much as he wants.
The concrete previous history you have, he knows what he can get from you, and I do not think he would willingly let you go that easily if he knows he could keep you the same or even with more power than before.
You would not push him, do not wait more than a week to contact him in case he does not contact you before, and directly tell him how much you want and need him back, that you would respect his privacy and do your best for your relationship to work.
Once you do that, do not keep calling or messaging him but wait until he gets back to you.
I am sorry to know how tough and painful it's been for you, but again, I can tell you with confidence that based on what you shared here, the chances you appear to have to get back in the relationship are very high as long as you take into account what I mentioned before. Please look for all the support you can get from close friends and family, for you to be able to better cope with this tough situation.
Sure it will, you just need to make sure you direct your questions to me, in that way I will know an d will reply ASAP. I am here to support you.
the same way as you posted this question today, but include my name in ti like saying: For Rafael or I want Rafael to answer it.
I am willing to follow up , in that way we would know how this situation evolves an d make adjustments in order to promote the best possible urtcomes.
If you do not push him, but show you care and want him back and are willing to do your best, XXXXX XXXXX believe he would come back. If he does not contact you in a wee time, take the initiative as previously explained, to promote the reconciliation.
Thank you for your trust and please do not forget to rate support before you leave the chat.
I support you and hope thins evolve as you want.
Bye for now.
Yes, what's your other question?
I think he is a very manipulative person, with serious mental health and personality problems, including the addictions you mentioned. Thus anything coming from him would be distorted by all those serious issues, so continue to be manipulative, and it would not be healthy to trust him at all.
Yes, as I explained before, many times people presenting these behavioral patterns and issues do as much as possible to perpetuate relationships, where they could keep fueling their ego and getting any form of benefit from the other person