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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1427
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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I am engaged to someone, but lately have been having cold feet.

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I am engaged to someone, but lately have been having cold feet. Part of the problem is the long distance because he is on the other side of the world. I dont know what to do
Hello. You should not go through the wedding if you are having these feelings. Is there a way you can ask to postpone the wedding if you have a date set? Is there a way you can be with him physically? It's difficult to asses a relationship when you can't be with each other. If you could find a way to be with him and see if the relationship is worth pursuing or breaking up, this would be your best option. If this is not an option, I would at the very least break off the engagement until you can both work though this, or you definitely decide to walk away. Long distance relationships can be very difficult. You don't want to do something as major as getting married if you have strong feelings about not going through with it. You want to be 100%. I don't know the details of your situation, but if any of those options I mentioned are possible for you, that is what I recommend.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
I just feel that I have an overwhelming responsibility when he does get a fiance visa to the US. He doesnt speak english so I will be the one to guide him with everything.

The fact that I cant completely expressmyself in our native language also worries me because he doesn't speak english
Iam confused why you could rate me negatively which effects me deeply on this site. I have a wonderful track record of satisfied clients. I'm not sure how else you would like for me to help you with the limited information you have provided. Please let me know what you are expecting so I can help you further. Some more information about your situation would have been a great help to me.
Dr. Paige and other Relationship Specialists are ready to help you
I still stand by my original answer. It is difficult to give a full, detailed answer with such limited information and I do not feel I deserve the poor service rating which I will be punished for through this site.
You should not marry someone you feel so strongly about when it comes to the responsibility you describe. I still would suggest to you that you postpone the wedding. Marrying someone who you have such communication issues with can pose a lot of difficulty, not just the ones obvious to you now. You really need to get to know him a lot better before jumping into this commitment.
Is it possible for him to come over there and spend some time with you without going through the wedding yet? You didn't state when the date was set, but is this possible?

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