It is your fear and no one can control your feelings except you; in other words, no one can MAKE you feel a certain way. If you are feeling rejected, those feelings are coming from inside of you. It may indicate that you have some self-esteem problems, but I do not know. Making space in a relationship usually means giving it some time to develop, cool off or whatever is needed because it is space that is indicated. So, not so many phone calls, texts or other communications for a week or so or maybe longer ... that is to be determined by the circumstances. I would need more information to be more specific. Just keep in mind if there has been any abuse or violence involved, you may need to make a lot of space and time and maybe consider that the relationship is not suited to you. Remember the old saying, "There are lots of fish in the sea" and if the person does not want to be with you, you can get over it and move on. It is not about you. It is about them and their reasons.
Hi Dr. Tom,
Thank you for the reply, I had sent this to a specific expert who has been working with me on this situation so i am not sure why you got this message. Anyhow, no there is no violence no abuse.
It's ok I appreciate your answer. I have a hard time with space because my boyriend is so self contained, avoidant, distancer and im more anxious, persuer. I am working on breaking this dance/habit that is why im here. I am currently seeing a therapist and he is good. I just like to get additional help from others like i am right now. Are you good at disifering the distancer/persuer relationship?