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I'm sorry for the struggle in your relationship.
I would imagine some form of anxiety or depression was present prior to this panic attack, but maybe not to this level. Was there anything you are aware of that may have triggered this? He may be feeling some sort of stress, pressure, and or fear in his life.
There are different forms of anxiety. If there has been a trauma in his life he may be experiencing anxiety more specific to that. Generalized anxiety disorder is the more general free floating, nothing specific explains the panic attack.
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Hello, thanks for joining me. Both anxiety and depression is treatable.
thanks for you
Often a combination of talk therapy and psychotropic medications are the common treatment approach.
yes i think he was in abad relatitionship before
Maybe he is afraid being in a relationship because of past hurt.
yes i think that
but i have abd relationship before
and iam not afraid
the reson of panic attack becouse of me
but i wasn't know that he is so sensetive and sick
i dropped him 2 times but i just saying that and after 1 hours i called him back and solve the proplem
Is he willing to talk to you about his struggle? He may be more vulnerable genetically to anxiety and depression than someone else. Do not blame yourself, you did not make this happen. Sensitive can make a person susceptible to anxiety.
no he refuse to go doctor
but he admit that have proplem
It would be best if he could talk to you more about this, answer questions you have. You must be confused about all of this. That's unfortunate because he could get treatment if he sees the doctor.
Admitting the problem is the first step in getting better.
but what i have to do
be with him or not
he don't want to be with me anymore also he want me call and ask about him
and i am really confused
You can love and support him, but he has to be willing to get the help, to see the doctor or a counselor.
He has ended the relationship?
he told me i have to think
becouse iam afraid to dropped me again
Maybe giving him a little time to sort this out could help him.
iam afraid becouse his ungle like that
he all the time talk about his uncle
sico and no one deal with him so it is afamily issue
Yes, you are afraid he will end the relationship. Afraid he will be like his uncle? He may also be afraid he will be like his uncle. Anxiety is scary and uncomfortable.
so what do you think i have to do?
Sadly some families do not talk openly about depression or anxiety they may feel shame.
yes that is what happens with them
and i read to much about depression but still i don't know what to do
he don't want to help him self
If he is unwilling to talk to you about this, and he is pushing you away, you may need to give him the space for now. That does not mean it will not change for the better. You are sad and feeling rejected, you need to have someone to talk to, support for you.
and he had 3 panic attack in 2 weeks
and he is young 26 years old
People who love someone who is anxious or depressed can feel really helpless- because he has to decide to get the help. Maybe it will get uncomfortable for him and he will see a doctor.
yes really i need support
he will back normal or what
Three panic attacks- that's scary, some people feel like they are having a heart attack.
he said that
If he get the help he needs there is a much better chance he will be back to how he was before.
and about his ides to end the relation?
because he feel that i am the cause of his depression
For now you can tell him you are thinking about him and worried about him and want to support him. Being anxious and depressed- it's hard to maintain a relationship when his symptoms are so bad. You are not the cause of the depression- no.
He may be depressed because he keeps all his feelings in and thinks negatively.
so you think if he see doctor he will back to keep the relation our weeding suppose after 5 month
It may also be genetic- you can not make him depressed. The only way you can help in this is for him to share more with you, allow you in to support him. If he is pushing you away that makes it really difficult for you to support him.
His ending the relationship may be related to his feelings changing in the relationship, do you think?
why it is changing?
no one perfect and my personalty so quite but it is normaly to problem happens some times
A person can be depressed and anxious and continue to love and care for others. If he says he wants to end the relationship I wonder if his feelings have changed and he is pushing you away. It's hard to know when he tells you so little. Was he starting to push you away- did you notice a change in how he was with you?
No, no one is perfect- you are right about that.
he pushing me a way
It would be so much more helpful to you if he would talk to you more about this. Have you asked him if his feelings have changed?
and he was so upset
and angry and he told me i don't want to think about this now
As difficult as this is you may have to give him space to think about this. If you push too much he may push you even further away.
yes i start to do that
but what about me ?lool
I know it hurts you, I'm sorry for that.
You have to find support for you to help you through this, while he figures this out. Do you have friends or family you can talk to?
yes and they all told me he love he will back
but really i don't think
becouse i know he is tired know but he can now his feelings towards me
You do matter, you are special, remember that. It's scary for you to think he will not be back to himself.
Of course, this is one of the most difficult things to deal with in life- fear of losing someone special in our life.
It can feel like when someone dies- very very sad.
what do think iam right about my question
he is tired but he know about his feelings towered me right?
really for the time being i want to know the true
to see how i can help my self now
If he does not share with you, talk to you, you can not read his mind. After some time and rest, he may be more willing to talk. He may be confused- consumed with anxiety and depression. Of course you want the truth. It is most important to care for you- because you can not change him- he has to do that.
so how i can help to convince him see doctor first
then i will ask him about me
You did not cause him to have a panic attack- it's something within him. Telling him you care and worry about him, and if he wants you would go with him to the doctor- help and support him in any way you can.
ok but he say to me don't remember me that iam sick person
and after that he start to push me away
He has to allow you to help- you can not make him- or force him. Telling him talking to the doctor could bring him some comfort and relief. He tells you not to remember him because he is a sick person?
he told i admit i have problem i will go to doctor when i want
Tell him you care and you are there for him, and if he is sick he can get help for that. Tell him he matters to you.
and alone without me
i said alot of that words
but he want from me to stop talking in this issues
That is exactly right- he has to decide- I know that is really hard for you. He knows you care then.
i care like past
old i have to reduce a little of caring
bye calling him or sending msgs
the problem is we are working in the same copmany
and i feel when he see he make him worse
i wonder he was very sensitive kind gentle polite and lover
how come to be like that ????????????/
Do you think you could give him space and time to think about this? Let him sort this out for awhile and hope and pray he comes back to you the same person he was before. You will not stop caring, but you may have to do it from a distance. Yes, more difficult when you work together. You can give him space at work too. Allow him to seek you out, let him realize you are special, a gift.
he also don't want to see anyone
family friends me
he alone in his house
It's really hard and it hurts, it does not make sense- so it's difficult trying to understand. Maybe he has to get really lonely before he gets help.
Is his family checking on him?
yes but they think he is a sensitive guy
i think i am know the result he will not go to doctor and he will end the relation too
so now tell me how i can be better
You worry about him. It's important that his family or friends checks on him when he is struggling. That hurts a lot to worry he will end the relationship. He has to make those decisions- not much you can do to force him.
ya i know
but really i am fed up with him and tiered because in the first i said to him i can be with you in a relation i get divorced soon and my dad pass away so he convince he will support but i think that's he who need to support and i tried for one week and really i love him and care but i can't
When we hurt in a relationship, lose someone, time is the true healer. It's normal for you to feel sad, worried, etc. Have people to talk to, or write in a journal. Allow yourself to feel sad, cry, that's part of you getting better. Also be with people who care about you. Find things to do to get your mind off this for a bit.
i meant i didn't want to be in a relation
You feel angry too- that's okay- that's normal.
This is hard on you!
yes alot and many guys after my divorced up used me
and go without say bye at least
He's hurting you by pushing you away- that is unfair to you- and makes you angry. You have to work on getting stronger- find a good man :)
may be i hate all men know
he was so good
You can say goodbye or just pull away and allow him to seek you out. Yes it feels like hate when you hurt so bad.
Anger is sadness and knowing this makes little sense.
do you think he will seek for me
if i go a way?
Whatever you feel is okay- because you have been hurt- maybe reminds you of being hurt before. There is a better chance he will seek you out if you pull away and give him space. Some people feel smothered and pull further away.
You chase and he may run further away. You not chasing him, will make him think more about you.
It's hard to let go- of course!
so i can wait for two day
because he told me before i will see doctor in Saturday
and if he son't i will say to him good bye
and if he saw the doctor and pushing me out
also i will say good bye
I do need to go in a few minutes. I hope chatting has helped you a bit. I do hope things get better for you. Please let me know how things go. Yes wait a couple days, a good start- maybe longer. Let him think and wonder about you. That sounds like a good plan. The best to you my friend!
Be strong and have courage!
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I will say a prayer for you and him also.
The best to you!
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