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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 2816
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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My boyfriend is muslim and he told me he cannot see me during

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My boyfriend is muslim and he told me he cannot see me during ramadan because we are not married at it is a sin. However, he has been acting distant for a while, creating arguments, putting the phone down on me, waking away from me. We were in a realtionship for a year, Im seperated from my husband and we are still friends - my boyfriend has an issue with that and also with me talking to other men, having a job/ career ... I was promoted recently and moving away - we were supposed to move away together. However, with his behaviour Im not sure if he wants to:he never stated it but his actions tell me he has cold feet. he moved in with his friends, doesnt want to talk to me and earlier today when asked to see him he found million reasons why he couldnt. He suggested days I am not available and eventually put the phone down on me. I blocked him from my emals and blocked his number. A I over-reacting or is this really going nowhere?
Hi. Welcome. I am a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.

To answer the question simply...it sounds as if this relationship is not going anywhere. Unless of course you want to change who you are, with whom you are fiends and your job and career. That sounds like a lot to give up and change for someone who acts distant and injured once things don't go his way. I would imagine you feel that you deserve more and that is why you have reached out here....i think you do and I do not hear anything that indicates you are over-reacting.
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Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Any insight why his behaviour has turned? It feels to me as if he has shut me out of his life, doesnt want to communicate with me and hus bhas attitude that is very hostile. He does not want to state he dors not want to move with me but his actions indicate he does not. I feel I do deserve honesty as I did my best to ensure we have a good foundation. It makes me feel as if he hates me. I feel the issue is with his beliefs and insecurities but puts all the blame on me instrad of bei g honest wigh himself and me. I do love him anx believed we have a future. Is there anythi g I can do ?

You may be correct that his feelings have changed and is unable to communicate them to you. Your views may not be in line with one another on many important things.

I might try and give him space and pull back a bit and see if that allows him some time to reflect and figure out how he feels. Please take care of yourself as well as when you focus so much on how he feels you could get lost in the process and I don't want that to happen.
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