he is no longer living with her. He stays with his friend and his friends wife in a different city. I stay with him almost every night and have had conversations with those close to him about the situation. He doesnt treat her as a wife so to speak. she cheated on him and that was heart breaking, it took him a long time to move on. the only thing they still do is text. sometimes in refernce to the divorce, other times he is "just being polite". He is very much a 'death do us part' kind of man so departing a marriage without death is very hard for him. I dont know if i have the right to ask him to keep their relationship strictly divorce related or not. they were married four years so i can understand its hard to let go. but if im going to give my heart over then I need to feel that he can get over what she did to him.