Am I confused but what is a mistress, I also told him I did not want to be one. He justified it by saying I am not a mistress because he is not hiding me from the world and he and his wife does not live together or share a bed together. I mention so do I told my family I am messing with a married man or if I got in a relationship do I tell people my bf is married. He told me why tell them anything. I feel that if I have to hide the truth it would be wrong.