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Dr.G.
Dr.G., Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1482
Experience:  Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota
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I have a question. The guy I meet online 6 months ago, we

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I have a question. The guy I meet online 6 months ago, we went on 2 dates. Today while we talked on the phone I asked him when will his divorced be finalized and he responded that's up to my lawyer, So, I said what did you not o to court and sign the papers. He said no but he contact a lawyer and waiting to receive a call about court for divorce. I feel deceived an I told him so, and I told him lets put a pause on things-sexually until after the divorce. We did not have sex but we did have foreplay on our last date. He told me he been separted so long that he is not married and its a piece of paper. I told him It was not a piece a paper when you too first got married, that piece a paper meant the world until you too started to have problems. He told that his wife says they ares till married but he has been married to her in a long time. I guess I hit a nail when I said she is right, you are married and just because she was wrong you are still married, I even said what do I tell my family I am messing around with a married man. He told he did not want to discuss and I said fine, but mention that reason you choose not to talk about it is because you know it bothers me. Prior, to all of this, I was thinking about starting a relationship and actually getting involved with him . It seems as now I may have to take a step back, also on our date he asked me for $10 for gas this is our second date and he said he would pay me back. I told him no, and he said he wills till pay me back because he doe s not wan to owe me. How do I handle this situation.
Well you have two situations. The gas money and the marriage. Which one do you want help with?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Both
Well, I think you handled the marriage issue perfectly. You sound like a woman who wants no drama in her life. I think you stated yourself clearly and explained exactly what you want from him. I hope you stick to it. With the money issue, I say let it go. Consider it a favor you did for him. No sense in stressing over that.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


Am I confused but what is a mistress, I also told him I did not want to be one. He justified it by saying I am not a mistress because he is not hiding me from the world and he and his wife does not live together or share a bed together. I mention so do I told my family I am messing with a married man or if I got in a relationship do I tell people my bf is married. He told me why tell them anything. I feel that if I have to hide the truth it would be wrong.

I agree with everything you have said. You are definitely thinking about this situation with a clear and rational mind.
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