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Ok one more question. I was talking to my mom about this last night. She asked me if he leaves her and comes back to me how do I know that he won't do this very thing to me in the future. I know that there is really no way of answering that and that I would have to trust him. I feel like this a unique situation because he clearly doesnt love her like he should or he would'nt still be talking to me. He would of committed to her and his family 100%. But that doesnt change the fact that he chose her over me. I do feel like he chose her mainly for his kids but that doesnt change the fact he still chose her regardless of the reasons he thought he could make it work again with her for them. Do I believe he loves her yes I do, I believe he loves her as just as I love my kids dad but I don't believe he is where he wants to be. So my question is have you dealt with situations like this before? Is the outcome ever good? Am I just his second choice, the fall back girl?