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Dr. Paige
Dr. Paige, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1427
Experience:  Ph.D. Licensed Psychologist
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i wanted to talk about my relationship with my fiancé. she

Customer Question

i wanted to talk about my relationship with my fiancé. she told her family a while ago about the ring and they didn’t like the idea and told her to give it back to me and for her to leave me alone. she was suppose to give me back the ring 2 week ago but she never showed up. She texted me 2 saturdays ago that her and her family are arguing about it and she is trying to convince them. is there anything I can do? I think there is something i can do about this..
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 3 years ago.
Hello. I don't know if you have any kind of relationship with her parents and know what their reasons are or not, but you could talk to them directly IF and only if your girlfriend would be ok with that. The first thing I would do is ask your girlfriend if you can do something about it. She will either feel that she can handle it herself or she will ask you to help. That's really all you can do without getting her upset at this point. You don't want to just take it upon yourself to do something you think you should do without discussing it with your girlfriend, so that would be your first step. If she is ok with you contacting her parents, then you should carefully and politely state your case and make sure you listen to their side of it as well. If everyone talks this through and is adult and mature about it, you should be able to reach some sort of conclusion.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


ok.. last saturday saturday she called me and she started to talk about the ring if I told my mom that she had to give it back.. and i did tell her and she said she wanted to tell her.. i don’t really know why, but she still has never given it back to me and she never told me then when she was going to do it, she just told me she missed me and wanted to come over to my house and watch a movie with me.. so, its really confusing to me..

Expert:  Dr. Paige replied 3 years ago.
I think she is deeply conflicted. She wants to marry you it seems, but she also doesn't want to cause a big issue with her parents who are very influential in her life. She probably hasn't given it back because she just doesn't want to. She wants to be with you and is having a difficult time being torn between what her parents want and what she wants. You need to just be honest with her and explain your side of all of this and ask her how she is doing and how she is feeling about the entire situation.

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